Jokes of the day for Wednesday, 25 June 2008

Funny jokes, funny photo and funny video collected from the internet on Wednesday, 25 June 2008
  • Currently 9.54/10

Rating: 9.5/10 (702)

A guy got on a bus one day and...

A guy got on a bus one day and sat in the aisle seat beside an elderly lady. A few minutes later, he couldn't control himself and had to let loose a big noisy fart.
Embarrassed, he tried to make conversation with the lady and asked her "Do you by any chance have today's paper"?

The lady looked at him and said "No, but the next time we pass by a tree I'll grab you a handful of leaves."

#joke
Joke | Source: Dos santos online - Not joke related site, but with joke of the day
  • Currently 6.22/10

Rating: 6.2/10 (9)

Having lunch one day, a sex th...

Having lunch one day, a sex therapist said to her friend, "According to a survey we just completed, ninety percent of all people masturbate in the shower. Only ten percent of them sing."

"Really?" Her friend said, looking slightly shocked.

The therapist nodded. "And do you know what song they sing?" The friend shook her head.

The therapist said, "I didn't think so."
#joke
Joke | Source: Joke rating machine - Jokes in categories, joke of the day by categories
  • Currently 5.00/10

Rating: 5.0/10 (7)

All Categories

Q: How many Manchester City fans does it take to change a lightbulb?
A: None - they're quite happy living in the shadows.
#joke #short
Joke | Source: funny-haha.co.uk - Number of jokes in categories, joke of the day
  • Currently 3.80/10

Rating: 3.8/10 (5)

Should have been here sooner!

An elderly couple were killed in an accident and found themselves being given a tour of heaven by Saint Peter. "Here is your oceanside condo, over there are the tennis courts, swimming pool, and two golf courses. If you need any refreshments, just stop by any of the many bars located throughout the area."

"Heck, Gloria," the old man hissed when Saint Peter walked off, "we could have been here ten years ago if you hadn't heard about all that stupid oat bran, wheat germ, and low-fat diets!"

#joke
Joke | Source: http://www.pacprod.com/ - Pacific products joke of the day
  • Currently 4.13/10

Rating: 4.1/10 (8)

A man goes into his doctor's s...

A man goes into his doctor's surgery and says "Doctor, can you give me something for persistent wind?" The doctor thinks for a moment then replies, "Yes, go and buy a kite."
#joke #short #doctor
Joke | Source: http://news.scotsman.com/ - Joke of the day
  • Currently 5.20/10

Rating: 5.2/10 (5)

This duck walks into a c...

This duck walks into a convenience store and asks the clerk, "Do you have any grapes?" The clerk says no, and the duck leaves.

The next day the duck returns and asks, "Do you have any grapes?" The clerk again says no, and the duck leaves.

The day after that the duck walks in the store again and asks "Do you have any grapes?" The clerk screams at the duck, "You've come in here the past two days and asked if we had any grapes. I told you no every time that we don't have any grapes! I swear if you come back in here again, and ask for grapes, I'll nail your webbed feet to the floor!!"

The duck leaves and returns the next day. This time he asks, "Do you have any nails?" The clerk replies "No," and the duck said, "Okay, then. Got any grapes?"

#joke
Joke | Source: http://www.webwombat.com.au/ - Jokes: Joke of the Day
  • Currently 5.71/10

Rating: 5.7/10 (7)

Remove 5 letters from this seq...

Remove 5 letters from this sequence (SVEIVELRALOI) to reveal a familiar English word.
CHECK ANSWER
Brain Teasers, puzzles, riddles, mathematical problems, mastermind, cinemania...

Executive ability is about dec...

Executive ability is about deciding quickly and getting somebody else to do the work.
#joke #short
Joke | Source: Click The City - Philippine's Leading Lifestyle and Entertainment Guide.
  • Currently 3.14/10

Rating: 3.1/10 (7)

Knock Knock Collection 193


Knock Knock

Who's there?

Whitney!

Whitney who?

Whitney have to say to me!


Knock Knock

Who's there?

Whittle!

Whittle who?

Whittle Orphan Annie!


Knock Knock

Who's there?

Who!

Who who?

You sound like an owl!


Knock Knock

Who's there?

Whoopi!

Whoopi who?

Whoopi cushion!


Knock Knock

Who's there?

Wicked!

Wicked who?

Wicked make beautiful music together!





#joke
Joke | Source: Joke of the Day - Jokes served hot and fresh daily.
  • Currently 4.20/10

Rating: 4.2/10 (5)

Paris having sex

Paris Hilton’s last date evidently could stand some improvement.

Halfway through making love, she had the Red cross came over and give the guy coffee and doughnuts.

#joke #short
Joke | Source: The Bartender's guide - Jokes, Drinks, and Poker
  • Currently 4.00/10

Rating: 4.0/10 (5)

i am so good in bed that...

i am so good in bed that when I have sex even the neighbors need a cigarette.
#joke #short
Joke | Source: Ray Owens' Joke A Day - Making Fun Of Morons Since 1863
  • Currently 4.43/10

Rating: 4.4/10 (7)

The Scientist and the Frog

There once was a scientist who studied frogs. One day, the scientist put the frog on the ground and told it to jump. The frog jumped four feet.

So the scientist wrote in his notebook, "Frog with four feet, jumps four feet."

So the scientist cut off one of one of the frogs legs. The scientist told the frog to jump. Frog jumped three feet. So the scientist wrote in his note book, "Frog with three feet, jumps three feet."

So the scientist cut of another leg. He told the frog to jump. The frog jumped two feet. So the scientist wrote in his notebook "Frog with two feet, jumps two feet."

The scientist cut off one more leg. He told the frog to jump. Frog jumped one foot. So the scientist wrote in his notebook, "Frog with one foot, jumps one foot."

So the scientist cut off his last leg.

"He said, "Frog jump. Frog jump. FROG JUMP!"

So the scientist wrote in his notebook, "Frog with no feet, goes deaf."

#joke
Joke | Source: Comedy Central: Jokes - Jokes provided daily from Comedy Central's archive.
  • Currently 4.91/10

Rating: 4.9/10 (11)

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