In a small Texas town there wa...In a small Texas town there was a "Nativity Scene" that showed great skill and talent had gone into creating it. But one small feature bothered me: the three wise men were wearing fireman's helmets. Totally unable to come up with a reason or explanation, I left.
At a "Quik Stop" on the edge of town, I asked the lady behind the counter about the helmets. She exploded into a rage, yelling at me, "You darn Yankees never read your Bibles!"
I assured her that I did, but simply couldn't recall anything about firemen in the Bible.
She jerked her Bible from behind the counter and riffled through some pages, and finally jabbed her finger at a passage. Sticking it in my face she said, "See, it says right here, 'The three wise men came from afar.'"
While my brother-in-law was tapping away on his home computer, his ten-year-old daughter sneaked up behind him. Then she turned and ran into the kitchen, squealing to the rest of the family, "I know Daddy's password! I know Daddy's password!"
"What is it? her older sisters asked, eagerly.
Proudly she replied, "Asterisk, asterisk, asterisk, asterisk, asterisk!"
A man goes to the doctor feeli...A man goes to the doctor feeling unwell. The doctor examines him and says: "You're suffering from Alice."
"I don't know," says the doctor, "But Christopher Robin went down with it"
Mrs C Smith, Penicuik
Did you hear about the man who bought a dog with no legs?
He called it cigarette. He used to take it out for a drag.
Neil Sutton, Corstorphine
Once upon a time there were two muffins in the microwave. Suddenly, one of the muffins said: "Man it's hot in here."
The other muffin exclaimed: "Look, a talking muffin!"
Tony White, Loanhead
Why does a room full of married people looks so empty?
There's not a single person in it . . .
Mark Allan, Niddrie
What do you call a boom-a-rang, that doesn't come back?
Eric Stevenson, Leith
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