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Jokes of the day
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Jokes of the day - daily portion of jokes. New jokes every day. Joke of the day archive is updated every day. Funny photo is updated daily. Funny video is updated daily. Links to great joke archives. Big archive of old jokes of the day, top rated jokes of the day. Jokes of the day are updated daily, bringing updated jokes. Rate jokes of the day.
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Jokes of the day for Tuesday, Jan the 6th 2009
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Intimate Cellmates |
| These two men were cellmates at state penitentiary for nine years. One day Larry said to Joe, "You know man its been a long time since we had some sex so you oughta let me fuck you."
Joe replied.
"Are you crazy?!!" Larry went on to say, "I promise you that it won't hurt and we'll flip a coin and see who fucks, who first. So, Joe thought about it for a minute and finally agreed. They flipped a coin and Larry won. Still having strong reservation Joe asked, "How will you tell if it hurts or not?"
Larry told Joe, "If it hurts you start making animal noises, and I'll stop. But if it feels good start singing."
Larry started the insertion and Joe screamed, Moooooooo.... Moooooo... Mooooon River... |
Permalink | Source : The Bartender's guide - Jokes, Drinks, and Poker
Rating: 5.0/10 (2 votes cast) |
| A husband returns home one night to find his wife in bed with a naked man. "What are you doing?" he shouts. The wife turns to her lover and says, "I told you he was stupid!" |
Permalink | Source : Click The City - Philippine's Leading Lifestyle and Entertainment Guide.
Rating: 7.0/10 (2 votes cast) |
What kind of tree fits in your hand?
A palm tree
Brian Phelps, Craiglockhart
If you have a joke you would like to share with us e-mail: letters_en@ edinburghnews.com
The full article contains 36 words and appears in Edinburgh Evening News newspaper.
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Permalink | Source : http://news.scotsman.com/ - Joke of the day
Rating: 5.0/10 (3 votes cast) |
"The eight Saddam body doubles are gathered in one of the bunkers in downtown Baghdad. Tariq Aziz, the deputy prime minister, comes in and says, 'I have some good news and some bad news.' They ask for the good news first.
"Aziz says, 'The good news is that Saddam is still alive, so you all still have jobs.'
"And the bad news?" they ask.
Aziz replies, 'He's lost an arm.'" |
Permalink | Source : Joke rating machine - Jokes in categories, joke of the day by categories
Rating: 5.0/10 (2 votes cast) |
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Mother decided that 10-year-old Cathy should get something “practical” for her birthday.
“Suppose we open a savings account for you?” Mother suggested. Cathy was delighted. |
A manager brings a dog into a nightclub to work.
The dog is a brilliant piano player. He plays all the
standards. He’s sitting there, pounding out the tunes,
when all of a sudden, a big dog comes in and drags him
out. The nightclub owner asks, “What happened?”
The manager says,
“That’s his mother. She wants him to be a doctor.” |
Permalink | Source : Joke of the day - Jokes of the day on Wordpress
Rating: 5.0/10 (10 votes cast) |
Seen in real CVs:
"The company made me a scapegoat - just like my three previous employers."
"While I am open to the initial nature of an assignment, I am decidedly disposed that it be so oriented as to at least partially incorporate the experience enjoyed heretofore and that it be configured so as to ultimately lead to the application of more rarefied facets of financial management as the major sphere of responsibility."
"Please call me after 5:30 because I am self-employed and my employer does not know I am looking for another job."
"My goal is to be a meteorologist. But since I have no training in meteorology, I suppose I should try stock brokerage."
"Interests: Donating blood. 14 gallons so far."
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Permalink | Source : Jobs 1 - UK Job search joke of the day
Rating: 6.0/10 (2 votes cast) |
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