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Jokes of the day
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Jokes of the day for Monday, Jan the 19th 2009
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Business one-liners 41 |
| The more time you spend in reporting on what you are doing, the less time you have to do it in. Stability is achieved when you spend all your time doing nothing but reporting on the nothing you are doing.
The more trivial your research, the more people will read it and agree.
The more vital your research, the less people will understand it.
The more you run over a cat, the flatter it gets.
The most important item in an order will no longer be available.
The most interesting results happen only once.
The most savage controversies are those about matters as to which there is no good evidence either way.
The nice thing about standards is that there are so many of them to choose from.
The number of people watching you is proportional to the stupidity of your action.
The obscure a bureaucrat may see eventually; the completely apparent takes forever. |
Permalink | Source : The Bartender's guide - Jokes, Drinks, and Poker
Rating: 6.0/10 (1 vote cast) |
| Why did the supermodel climb over the chain-link fence? She wanted to see what was on the other side. |
Permalink | Source : Click The City - Philippine's Leading Lifestyle and Entertainment Guide.
Rating: 5.0/10 (2 votes cast) |
A couple walking in the park noticed a young man and woman sitting on a bench, passionately kissing.
"Why don't you do that?" said the wife.
"Honey," replied her husband, "I don't even know that woman!" |
Permalink | Source : Joke rating machine - Jokes in categories, joke of the day by categories
Rating: 5.0/10 (1 vote cast) |
A guy got on a bus one day and sat in the aisle seat beside an elderly lady. A few minutes later, he couldn't control himself and had to let loose a big noisy fart.
Embarrassed, he tried to make conversation with the lady and asked her "Do you by any chance have today's paper"? The lady looked at him and said "No, but the next time we pass by a tree I'll grab you a handful of leaves." |
Permalink | Source : Dos santos online - Not joke related site, but with joke of the day
Rating: 5.8/10 (6 votes cast) |
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A paperboy said to a customer one day, “Mr. Smith, I wish I had twenty customers like you.”
“Gosh, that’s nice to hear,” said Smith, “but I’m kind of surprised considering I never tip all |
| THE MONITOR confirmed cardiac arrest as an elderly man suddenly lost consciousness. After about 20 seconds of resuscitation, he came to.
Explaining to him that his heart had momentarily stopped, I asked if he remembered anything unusual during that time.
“I saw a bright light,” he said, “and in front of me a man dressed in white.”
Zeroing in on this near-death impression, I inquired if he could describe the figure.
“Sure, doctor,” he replied. “It was you.”
http://funny-jokes.blogspot.com/ |
Permalink | Source : Joke of the day - Jokes of the day on Wordpress
Rating: 4.8/10 (4 votes cast) |
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