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Jokes of the day
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Jokes of the day - daily portion of jokes. New jokes every day. Joke of the day archive is updated every day. Funny photo is updated daily. Funny video is updated daily. Links to great joke archives. Big archive of old jokes of the day, top rated jokes of the day. Jokes of the day are updated daily, bringing updated jokes. Rate jokes of the day.
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Jokes of the day for Tuesday, Mar the 31st 2009
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Gravity-Defying Tequila |
A guy sits at a bar in a skyscraper restaurant high above the city. He slams a shot of tequila, goes over to the window and jumps out.
The guy sitting next to him cant believe what he just saw. Hes more surprised when, 10 minutes later, the same guy walks back into the bar and sits down next to him.
The astonished onlooker asks, How did you do that? I just saw you jump out the window, and were hundreds of feet above the ground!
The jumper responds by slurring, Well, I dont get it either. I slam a shot of tequila, and when I jump out the window, the tequila makes me slow down right before I hit the ground. Watch. He takes a shot, goes to the window and jumps out.
The other guy runs to the window and watches as the guy falls to just above the sidewalk, slows down and lands softly on his feet. A few minutes later, the jumper walks back into the bar.
The other guy has to try it, too, so he orders a shot of tequila. He slams it and jumps out the window. As he reaches the bottom, he doesnt slow down at all. SPLAT!
The first guy orders another shot of tequila. The bartender shakes his head. Youre really an a**hole when youre drunk, Superman. |
Permalink | Source : Comedy Central: Jokes - Jokes provided daily from Comedy Central's archive.
Rating: 5.5/10 (2 votes cast) |
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Did you hear about t |
| Did you hear about the new blonde paint? It's not real bright, but its cheap, and spreads easy. |
Permalink | Source : The Bartender's guide - Jokes, Drinks, and Poker
Rating: 3.0/10 (4 votes cast) |
| Dad: Junior, how did you get your clothes ripped? Son: I was trying to stop a boy from getting beat up. Dad: Oh? What boy? Son: Me! |
Permalink | Source : Click The City - Philippine's Leading Lifestyle and Entertainment Guide.
Rating: 7.0/10 (4 votes cast) |
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jokes of the day ads
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jokes of the day ads
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Drinking jacket... |
A little girl was watching her parents dress for a formal party. When she saw her dad donning his tuxedo, she warned, "Daddy, you shouldn't wear that suit."
"And why not, Darling?"
"You know that it always gives you a headache next morning."
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Permalink | Source : http://www.pacprod.com/ - Pacific products joke of the day
Rating: 7.0/10 (1 vote cast) |
Last Saturday morning I got up early, put on my long johns and dressed quietly. I made a lunch, grabbed the dog and went to the garage to hook up the boat to the truck and down the driveway I went.
Coming out of the garage rain is pouring down; it is like a torrential downpour. There is snow mixed in with the rain, and the wind is blowing 50 mph.
Minutes later, I returned to the garage. I came back into the house and turned the TV to the weather channel. I find it's going to be bad weather all day long, so I put the boat back in the garage, quietly undressed and slipped back into bed.
There I cuddled up to my wife's back, now with a different anticipation, and whispered, "The weather out there is terrible."
To which she sleepily replies,
"Can you believe my stupid husband is out there fishing?" |
Permalink | Source : Joke rating machine - Jokes in categories, joke of the day by categories
Rating: 7.0/10 (5 votes cast) |
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jokes of the day ads
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jokes of the day ads
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| After a series of tests, the 3 top candidates were chosen for a final interview with the CIA Director for a job opening. The first one's interview went really well... so the Director says: "I think you are the right man for the job, there is just one last thing you must do to prove your loyalty, here is a gun, go to the next room and shoot your wife." The man stands up and says, "Sorry Sir, I can't do that" and walks out. The same thing happens with the second applicant. The third guy's interview went well, so he is asked to prove his loyalty to the future job in the same way. The Guy takes the gun, goes next door. The CIA Director hears : "Bang...".. pause ...... "Bang, Bang, Bang, Bang." ..... long pause..... then a scuffle and noises...... silence. The third applicant returns to the Director's office and says" Some Idiot loaded this gun with blanks... so I had to strangle her!" |
Permalink | Source : Dos santos online - Not joke related site, but with joke of the day
Rating: 7.4/10 (10 votes cast) |
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A Meeting With the Board
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After a long, dry sermon, the minister announced that he wished to meet with the church board after the service. The first man to arrive was a stranger.
“You misunderstood my announcement. This is a meeting of the board,” said the minister.
“I know,” said the man. “If there is anyone here more bored than I am, I’d like to meet him.” |
Permalink | Source : Belief net - Joke of the day, features on religion, spirituality, faith
Rating: 5.7/10 (6 votes cast) |
Q: Why was the blonde so excited when she finished her puzzle in 6 months?
A: Because the box said '2-4 Years'. |
Permalink | Source : Comedy.com - The World Famous Comedy.com Daily Joke!
Rating: 5.0/10 (2 votes cast) |
The seven dwarfs went off to work in the mine one day, while Snow White stayed at home to do the housework and cook their lunch.
However when she went to the mine to deliver their lunches, she found there had been a cave-in, and there was no sign of the dwarfs.
Tearfully she yelled in to the mine entrance: "hello - is anyone there. Can anyone hear me".
A voice floated up from the bowels of the mine:
" Australia will win the Rugby World Cup"
"Thank god" said Snow White "at least Dopey's still alive"
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Permalink | Source : Australia, India, Sri Lanka - Australian Joke of the day
Rating: 5.7/10 (7 votes cast) |
How do you make a bandstand?
Take away their chairs! |
Permalink | Source : Kiwi box - today's pick Joke of the day
Rating: 7.0/10 (2 votes cast) |
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The Devil And The Golfer |
| A stranger walks up to him and whispers, "Would you give up a fourth of your sex life?" |
Permalink | Source : jokes warehouse - Animal jokes, Blonde jokes, doctor jokes, drunk jokes and jokes of the day
Rating: 5.5/10 (2 votes cast) |
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Free GPS tracking service for mobile devices that allows you to track any cell phone with built-in GPS (or with Bluetooth GPS receiver) in real time - partner of the jokes of the day
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Travel photos
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Travel Photos Of Places - collection of photos from all around the world - frend of the jokes of the day
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