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Jokes of the day
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Jokes of the day - daily portion of jokes. New jokes every day. Joke of the day archive is updated every day. Funny photo is updated daily. Funny video is updated daily. Links to great joke archives. Big archive of old jokes of the day, top rated jokes of the day. Jokes of the day are updated daily, bringing updated jokes. Rate jokes of the day.
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Jokes of the day for Friday, Sep the 4th 2009
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Let Them Eat Homework |
| Whyd the boy eat his homework?
His teacher told him it was a piece of cake! |
Permalink | Source : Comedy Central: Jokes - Jokes provided daily from Comedy Central's archive.
Rating: 0.0/10 (0 votes cast) |
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You might be a redneck if 56 |
| You might be a reneck if...
The neighborhood dogs are afraid to come around your house because the fowl are big enough to hurt them.
You have ever had to climb up on the roof of an out building to get down any fowl that was frozen to the roof.
You have ever worried more about the outbuildings freezing than your vehicles.
You have ever had deer graze in your front yard close enough to the house that you could throw a rock and hit them.
You have ever dug up your driveway to fix your water line.
You have ever had to get up quickly in the morning in order to let the goat out before she dropped raisins on the kitchen floor.
Your wife is the only one that the geese will allow into the laundry room.
Any of your children learned to make very realistic animal noises before they learned to talk.
You have to stop a leak in your flatbottom boat with gum and chewing tobacco.
You have to pay your hair care professional in weekly installments of \$3.00. |
Permalink | Source : The Bartender's guide - Jokes, Drinks, and Poker
Rating: 1.0/10 (1 vote cast) |
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Knock Knock Collection 046 |
Knock Knock
Who's there?
Dennis!
Dennis who?
Dennis says I need to have a tooth out!
Knock Knock
Who's there?
Denise!
Denise who?
Denise are above your ankles!
Knock Knock
Who's there?
Denver!
Denver who?
Denver the good old days!
Knock Knock
Who's there?
Desi!
Desi who?
Desi'gnated hitter!
Knock Knock
Who's there?
Desiree!
Desiree who?
Desiree a ray of sunshine in my life...!
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Permalink | Source : Joke of the Day - Jokes served hot and fresh daily.
Rating: 0.0/10 (0 votes cast) |
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jokes of the day ads
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jokes of the day ads
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Seen on the door of a music shop: "Gone Chopin with my Liszt. Bach at 2pm. Offenbach sooner."
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Permalink | Source : http://news.scotsman.com/ - Joke of the day
Rating: 4.5/10 (2 votes cast) |
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Sales Help |
"I'd like to buy some gloves for my wife," the young man said, eyeing the attractive salesgirl. "But I don't know her size."
"Will this help?" she asked sweetly, placing her hand in his.
"Why yes," he answered. "Her hands are just slightly smaller that yours."
"Will there be anything else?" the salesgirl queried as she wrapped the gloves.
"Now that you mention it," he replied, "she also needs some lingerie." |
Permalink | Source : http://www.pacprod.com/ - Pacific products joke of the day
Rating: 0.0/10 (0 votes cast) |
Religious Bumper Stickers
Jesus Saves, Gretzky Scores!
Jesus is coming, look busy!
If God is your copilot, better change seats!
I believe in the big bang theory, God spoke and bang it happened.
If God created man in His image. Then what's wrong with you?
If you're living like there is no God, you'd better be right.
I get along with God just fine. It's his followers that I can't stand.
I am sorry, all of our angels and saints are busy helping other sinners right now. However, your prayer is important to us and we will answer it in the order it was received. Please stay on the line.
Heaven is a lonely place. Everybody thinks they're the only one going!
Caution: Non Exposure to the Son will cause burning!
Hell... Don't even go there
Welcome to eternity... will that be smoking or non smoking?
As long as there are tests, there will be prayer in school.
The problem with religious texts is that the answers aren't in the back, either.
Militant Agnostic - I don't know and you don't either!
O Lord, Save Me From Your followers.
Wanna come for a drive? It'll scare the hell out of you!
Don't drive faster than your guardian angel can fly. |
Permalink | Source : Joke rating machine - Jokes in categories, joke of the day by categories
Rating: 7.3/10 (7 votes cast) |
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jokes of the day ads
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jokes of the day ads
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| A mathematician, an accountant and an economist apply for the same job. The interviewer calls in the mathematician and asks "What do two plus two equal?" The mathematician replies "Four." The interviewer asks "Four, exactly?" The mathematician looks at the interviewer incredulously and says "Yes, four, exactly." Then the interviewer calls in the accountant and asks the same question "What do two plus two equal?" The accountant says "On average, four - give or take ten percent, but on average, four." Then the interviewer calls in the economist and poses the same question "What do two plus two equal?" The economist gets up, locks the door, closes the shade, sits down next to the interviewer and says; "What do you want it to equal?" |
Permalink | Source : Dos santos online - Not joke related site, but with joke of the day
Rating: 6.9/10 (8 votes cast) |
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A Recently Spotted Bumper Sticker:
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"What if the Hokey Pokey really is what it's all about?" |
Permalink | Source : Belief net - Joke of the day, features on religion, spirituality, faith
Rating: 5.4/10 (5 votes cast) |
| In the courtroom the judge is asking the little boy, "Do you want to live with your mother?" The little boy says, "No, she beats me." The judge says, "Do you want to live with your father?" "No, he beats me too," says the little boy. The judge scratches his head and says, "Ok, son, then who do you want to live with?" Without a moment's hesitation the boy says loudly, "The Houston Astros, because they don't beat anybody." |
Permalink | Source : Australia, India, Sri Lanka - Australian Joke of the day
Rating: 6.0/10 (7 votes cast) |
Id like to order a bar pizza, the idiot says.
Shall I ask them to cut it into six or twelve slices, the barmaid asks.
Six, please. I could never eat twelve pieces. |
Permalink | Source : Kiwi box - today's pick Joke of the day
Rating: 5.8/10 (8 votes cast) |
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Negligee |
| A young woman was preparing for her wedding. She asked her mother to go out and buy a nice long black negligee and carefully place it in her suitcase so it would not wrinkle. Well, Mom forgot until the last minute. So she dashed out and could only find a short pink nighty. She bought it and threw it into the suitcase. |
Permalink | Source : jokes warehouse - Animal jokes, Blonde jokes, doctor jokes, drunk jokes and jokes of the day
Rating: 0.0/10 (0 votes cast) |
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Free GPS tracking service for mobile devices that allows you to track any cell phone with built-in GPS (or with Bluetooth GPS receiver) in real time - partner of the jokes of the day
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Webmaster resurces
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Travel photos
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Travel Photos Of Places - collection of photos from all around the world - frend of the jokes of the day
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