Jokes of the day for Wednesday, 06 June 2012

Funny jokes, funny photo and funny video collected from the internet on Wednesday, 06 June 2012
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Jimmy Carr: Why Men Use Viagra

The reason old men use Viagra is not because theyre impotent. Its because old women are so very ugly.
#joke #short
Joke | Old joke from joke of the day archives - Check out other old jokes Sunday, 17 July 2011
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Rating: 3.5/10 (61)

The original title for Alien v...

The original title for Alien vs. Predator was Alien and Predator vs Chuck Norris. The film was cancelled shortly after going into preproduction. No one would pay nine dollars to see a movie fourteen seconds long.
#joke #short #chucknorris
Joke | Old joke from joke of the day archives - Check out other old jokes Friday, 20 May 2011
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Rating: 2.8/10 (13)

Funny video of the day - Girly Bloopers AFV Compilation - FAIL

Girly Bloopers AFV Compilation - FAIL - Funny home videos with grils FAIL - link to page video is posted initially.
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Rating: 4.4/10 (7)

Jesus Is Watching You!

There was a burglar who broke into a home and started to gather the items he wanted to take. All of a sudden he heard, "Jesus is watching you!" He didn't see anything in the dark house, so he went on with what he was doing.
He heard, "Jesus is watching you!" again and then he really wondered who wassaying that. He turned on the flashlight, scanned the room, and finally saw a parrot.
"Did you say that?" asked the burgler.
"Yes," replied the parrot.
"By the way, what's your name?" the burgler inquired."Moses," answered the parrot.
"That's a strange name for a parrot. Who named you that?"
"The same people who named their rotweiller Jesus!"

#joke
Joke | Old joke from joke of the day archives - Check out other old jokes Sunday, 04 July 2010
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Rating: 6.4/10 (38)

Chuck Norris is what Willis wa...

Chuck Norris is what Willis was talking about.
#joke #short #chucknorris
Joke | Old joke from joke of the day archives - Check out other old jokes Monday, 06 June 2011
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Rating: 3.1/10 (33)

Funny Photo of the day - This is The Cost You Pay for Crocs!

This is The Cost You Pay for Crocs! - In some cultures, the sudden onset of wound-like patterns on the skin of the top of the feet is called Croc-mata. | Source : Jokes of The Day - By Jokes of the day visitor
  • Currently 4.88/10

Rating: 4.9/10 (8)

Five Jewish Men

Five Jewish men influenced the history of Western civilization.
Moses said the law is everything.
Jesus said love is everything.
Marx said capital is everything.
Freud said sex is everything.
Einstein said everything is relative.

#joke #short
Joke | Old joke from joke of the day archives - Check out other old jokes Saturday, 06 June 2009
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Rating: 4.0/10 (30)

Deserted island

Harry was shipwrecked on a deserted island. For several months, he longed for someone to talk to; searched the horizons for even the suggestion of a ship.

One day, his committment was rewarded: A beautiful woman was washed up onto the beach, floating on a large steamer trunk. Harry got her all settled, and fed, and dried off and they started talking.

April asked Harry, "what is something you've REALLY missed being out here on a desserted island for so long?"

"A clean shirt," was Harry's response. With a huff, April reached into the steamer trunk and tossed Harry a shirt.

April let out a short huff, but persevered: "Surely there's SOMETHING you've really missed out here...all alone...on an island with NOBODY all this time?"

"Oh wow, YEAH, there sure is: I'd REALLY like a dry pillow to sleep on."

April reached into her steamer trunk once again and tossed Harry a pillow; and she would not be put off. Striking her most alluring pose, she asked in her most provocative voice, "C'mon, Harry, wouldn't you like to play around?"

Harry got all excited and started jumping up and down. "Don't tell me you have a set of GOLF CLUBS in there, too?!???!?!"

#joke
Joke | Old joke from joke of the day archives - Check out other old jokes Saturday, 06 June 2009
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Rating: 5.6/10 (29)

What hides this stereogram?

Stereogram - 3D Image
CHECK ANSWER
Brain Teasers, puzzles, riddles, mathematical problems, mastermind, cinemania...

Why Ask Why 01


Do you need a silencer if you are going to shoot a mime?
If the 7-11 is open 24 hours a day, 365 days a year, why are there locks on the doors?
If you tied buttered toast to the back of a cat and dropped it from a height, what would happen?
If a cow laughed, would milk come out her nose?
If nothing ever sticks to teflon, how do they make teflon stick to the pan?
If you're in a vehicle going the speed of light, what happens when you turn on the headlights?
Why do you need a driver's license to buy liquor when you can't drink and drive?
Have you ever imagined a world with no hypothetical situations?
How does the guy who drives the snowplow get to work in the mornings?

#joke
Joke | Old joke from joke of the day archives - Check out other old jokes Monday, 06 June 2011
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Rating: 4.5/10 (20)

Lightbulb Joke Collection 97


Q: How many procrastinators does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A: One--but he has to wait until the light is better.
Q: How many editors does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A: Only one, but first they have to rewire the entire building.
Q: How many editors does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A: Two--one to change the bulb and one to issue a rejection slip to the old bulb.
Q: How many managing editors does it take to change a lightbulb?
A: You were supposed to have changed that lightbulb last week!
Q: How many Conservative economists does it take to change a lightbulb?
A: None. The invisible hand does it.
Q: How many Conservative economists does it take to change a lightbulb?
A: None. "There is no need to change the lightbulb. All the conditions for illumination are in place. Recent surveys show growing confidence in the lightbulb lighting up again."
Q: How many Conservative economists does it take to change a lightbulb?
A: None, because, look! It's getting brighter! It's definitely getting brighter!
Q: How many economists does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A: None. If the light bulb really needed changing, market forces would have already caused it to happen.

#joke
Joke | Old joke from joke of the day archives - Check out other old jokes Sunday, 06 June 2010
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