Jokes of the day for Sunday, 26 August 2012

Funny jokes, funny photo and funny video collected from the internet on Sunday, 26 August 2012
  • Currently 9.38/10

Rating: 9.4/10 (56)

Good jokes-Long sunny day

You're roaming around the Big Ben in London at the end of a long sunny day. You run across into the ghosts of Sir Winston Churchill, Sir Charles Chaplin, and Ian Fleming, who all give you directions to the nearest restaurant. Whom don't you believe?
Your story teller, for there is no such thing as a completely sunny day in England.
#joke
Joke | Source: Really Funny Jokes - Really Funny jokes, adult jokes, Good jokes, short funny jokes, teacher jokes, affair jokes, kids jokes, doctor jokes, funny pictures
  • Currently 3.00/10

Rating: 3.0/10 (2)

Flustered

As an instructor in driver education at the local area High School, I've learned that even the brightest students can become flustered behind the wheel.

One day I had three beginners in the car, each scheduled to drive for 30 minutes.

When the first student had completed his time, I asked him to change places with one of the others.

Gripping the wheel tightly and staring straight ahead, he asked in a shaky voice, “Should I stop the car first?”

#joke
Joke | Source: Joke Diary - Really Funny Jokes Daily
  • Currently 3.45/10

Rating: 3.5/10 (11)

Funny video of the day - Kayak surprise

Kayak surprise - Good day to you - link to page video is posted initially.
  • Currently 4.33/10

Rating: 4.3/10 (3)

Some magicians can walk on wat...

Some magicians can walk on water. Chuck Norris can swim through land.
#joke #short #chucknorris
Joke | Source: Daily Chuck - Daily Chuck Norris Fact
  • Currently 3.80/10

Rating: 3.8/10 (5)

A man went to visit a friend a...

A man went to visit a friend and was amazed to find him playing chess with his dog. He watched the game in astonishment for a while. "I can hardly believe my eyes!" he exclaimed. "That's the smartest dog I've ever seen."

"Nah, he's not so smart," the friend replied. "I've beaten him three games out of five."
#joke
Joke | Source: A joke a day - Free Jokes of the Day Clean Funny Jokes via Email, Humor and Entertainment
  • Currently 3.00/10

Rating: 3.0/10 (2)

Funny Photo of the day - Braid Beard?

Braid Beard? - Would be like to girl have a beard. | Source : Jokes of The Day - By Jokes of the day visitor
  • Currently 3.88/10

Rating: 3.9/10 (17)

Neal Brennan: Boob Pictures

Girls will send me pictures with their boobs sometimes and its the best. Its the best. That never happens to my married guy friends. I shouldnt say it never happens. My married guy friends, their wives will send them pictures of their boobs, but its always with a note that says like, I think my rash is back.
#joke
Joke | Source: Comedy Central: Jokes - Jokes provided daily from Comedy Central's archive.
  • Currently 4.00/10

Rating: 4.0/10 (13)

This little piggy...

When my wife quit work to take care of our new baby daughter, countless hours of peek-a-boo and other games slowly took their toll.

One evening my wife smacked her bare toes on the corner of a dresser and, grabbing her foot, sank to the floor.

I rushed to her side and asked what she hurt.

She looked at me through tear-filled eyes and managed to moan, "It's the piggy that ate roast beef."

#joke
Joke | Source: Jokes - Used to be - Pacific products joke of the day, but site no longer works.
  • Currently 4.00/10

Rating: 4.0/10 (3)

Remove 4 letters from this seq...

Remove 4 letters from this sequence (STRUCITQURUEA) to reveal a familiar English word.
CHECK ANSWER
Brain Teasers, puzzles, riddles, mathematical problems, mastermind, cinemania...

Finding a Chinese Jew

Sid and Al were sitting in a Chinese restaurant. "Sid," asked Al, "are there any Jews in China?"

"I don't know," Sid replied. "Why don't we ask the waiter?"

When the waiter came by, Al asked him, "Are there any Chinese Jews?"

"I don't know sir, let me ask," the waiter replied, and he went into the kitchen. He returned in a few minutes and said, "No, sir. No, Chinese Jews."

"Are you sure?" Al asked.

"I will check again, sir," the waiter replied and went back to the kitchen. While he was still gone, Sid said, "I cannot believe there are no Jews in China. Our people are scattered everywhere."

When the waiter returned he said, "Sir, no Chinese Jews."

"Are you really sure?" Al asked again.

"I cannot believe there are no Chinese Jews."

"Sir, I ask everyone," the waiter replied exasperated. "We have Orange Jews, Prune Jews, Tomato Jews and Grape Jews, but we have no Chinese Jews."

#joke
Joke | Source: Jokes of the day - Taken from Bartender's guide to Jokes, Drinks, and Poker - once good site, no longer active.
  • Currently 2.89/10

Rating: 2.9/10 (9)

Q: What sits on the botto...

Q: What sits on the bottom of the ocean and twitches?

A: A nervous wreck!
#joke #short
Joke | Source: MHINTZ0929's Blog - New funny joke each day
  • Currently 3.33/10

Rating: 3.3/10 (3)

Q. Why are married women heavi...

Q. Why are married women heavier than single women?

A. Single women come home, see what's in the fridge and go to bed. Married women come home, see what's in bed and go to the fridge.
#joke #short
Joke | Old joke from joke of the day archives - Check out other old jokes Thursday, 29 October 2009
  • Currently 5.41/10

Rating: 5.4/10 (66)

Tig: Where Would You Go?

I was at a party, and this guy was hitting on me, and hes hitting on me with the most boring questions. One of them was, If you could go anywhere in the world, where would you go? And I was like, Anywhere? He was like, Anywhere. I was like, Uh -- to the other side of the room. Now, please, get out of the way of a woman and her dream.
#joke
Joke | Old joke from joke of the day archives - Check out other old jokes Thursday, 26 August 2010
  • Currently 5.89/10

Rating: 5.9/10 (38)

Blonde Light

Q: How do you make a blonde's eyes light up?

A: Put a flashlight in her ear.

#joke #short #blonde
Joke | Old joke from joke of the day archives - Check out other old jokes Friday, 26 August 2011
  • Currently 4.04/10

Rating: 4.0/10 (27)

How Many Witches. . .

Q: How many witches does it take to change a lightbulb?
A: Into what?

#joke #short
Joke | Old joke from joke of the day archives - Check out other old jokes Wednesday, 26 August 2009
  • Currently 5.57/10

Rating: 5.6/10 (14)

Cowboy in Church

One Sunday a cowboy went to church. When he entered, he saw that he and the preacher were the only ones present. The preacher asked the cowboy if he wanted him to go ahead and preach.
The cowboy said, "I'm not too smart, but if I went to feed my cattle and only one showed up, I'd still feed him."So the minister began his sermon.
One hour passed, then two hours, then two-and-a-half hours. The preacher finally finished and came down to ask the cowboy how he liked the sermon.
The cowboy answered slowly, "Well, I'm not very smart, but if I went to feed my cattle and only one showed up, I sure wouldn't feed him all the hay."

#joke
Joke | Old joke from joke of the day archives - Check out other old jokes Thursday, 26 August 2010
  • Currently 5.23/10

Rating: 5.2/10 (13)

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