Jokes of the day for Tuesday, 04 October 2016

Funny jokes, funny photo and funny video collected from the internet on Tuesday, 04 October 2016
  • Currently 9.58/10

Rating: 9.6/10 (1627)

Patient: Doctor, I have a litt

Patient: Doctor, I have a little man in my head, and he's cursing all the time!
Doctor: Well, this problem is really easy to fix! It will cost you $1000.
Patient: Doctor, do you know what the little guy just said?
#joke #short #doctor
Joke | Source: Smilezilla - Daily Jokes and Funny Stories
  • Currently 4.44/10

Rating: 4.4/10 (9)

“I was into this dude

“I was into this dude named Berry but it turned out he wasn't ripe for me.”

#joke #short
Joke | Source: Pun of the Day - Funny puns and jokes - the largest collection of humorous puns on the internet. New pun added daily.
  • Currently 6.00/10

Rating: 6.0/10 (8)

Scientology on Demand: aka

Scientology on Demand: aka Dianetflix. It's a streaming of consciousness.
#joke #short
Joke | Source: Pun Gents - Daily Jokes, One-liners, Groaners, Puns of the day :: Puns on Demand :: Punshine Girls and Boys!
  • Currently 2.86/10

Rating: 2.9/10 (7)

New dog breeds

The American Kennel club has decided to recognize these newbreeds of Dogs that are the result of cross breeding

Collie + Lhaso Apso: Collapso, a dog that folds up for easy transport.

Spitz + Chow Chow: Spitz-Chow, a dog that throws up alot.

Bloodhound + Borzoi: Bloody Bore, a dog that's not much fun.

Pointer + Setter: Poinsetter, a traditional Christmas pet.

Kerry Blue Terrier + Skye Terrier: Blue Skye, a dog for visionaries.

Pekingese + Lhaso Apso: Peekasso, an abstract dog.

Labrador Retriever + Curly Coated Retriever:Lab Coat Retriever, the choice of research scientists.

Newfoundland + Basset Hound: Newfound Asset Hound,a dog for financial advisers.

Terrier + Bulldog: Terribull, a dog that makes awful mistakes.

Bloodhound + Labrador: Blabrador, a dog that barks incessantly.

Malamute + Pointer: Moot Point, owned by...oh, well, it doesn't matter anyway.

Collie + Malamute: Commute, a dog that travels to work.

Deerhound + Terrier: Derriere, a dog that's true to the end.

#joke #christmas
Joke | Source: http://www.pacprod.com/ - Pacific products joke of the day
  • Currently 8.44/10

Rating: 8.4/10 (9)

 You Might Be A Redneck If 08


You might be a redneck if...
You have refused to watch the Academy Awards since "Smokey and the Bandit" was snubbed for best picture.
None of your shirts cover your stomach.
Your only condiment on the dining room table is the economy size bottle of ketchup.
The rear tires on your car are at least twice as wide as the front ones.
You consider "Outdoor Life" deep reading.
You prominently display a gift you bought at Graceland.
You use the term `over yonder' more than once a month.
Birds are attracted to your beard.
The diploma hanging in your den contains the words "Trucking Institute".
Your mother keeps a spit cup on the ironing board.

#joke
Joke | Source: Joke of the Day - Jokes served hot and fresh daily.
  • Currently 4.25/10

Rating: 4.3/10 (4)

Irritated with everything

Irritated with everything: Have you ever been in one of those moods where you don't really know what's wrong but you feel irritated with everyone and everything?
#joke #short
Joke | Source: Minion Quotes - Despicable Me Minions is a website dedicated to minions. Have a good time reading minion quotes, funny quotes or entertain yourself playing minion games.
  • Currently 7.20/10

Rating: 7.2/10 (5)

Find the right combination

The computer chose a secret code (sequence of 4 digits from 1 to 6). Your goal is to find that code. Black circles indicate the number of hits on the right spot. White circles indicate the number of hits on the wrong spot.
CHECK ANSWER
Brain Teasers, puzzles, riddles, mathematical problems, mastermind, cinemania...

The wise old Mother Superior f

The wise old Mother Superior from county Tipperary was dying. The nuns gathered around her bed trying to make her comfortable. They gave her some warm milk to drink, but she refused it. Then one nun took the glass back to the kitchen. Remembering a bottle of Irish whiskey received as a gift the previous Christmas, she opened and poured a generous amount into the warm milk.
Back at Mother Superior's bed, she held the glass to her lips. Mother Superior drank a little, then a little more. Before they knew it, she had drunk the whole glass down to the last drop.
"Mother", the nuns pleaded, "Please give us some wisdom before you die". She raised herself up in bed with a pious look on her face and said, "Don't sell that cow".
#joke #christmas
Joke | Old joke from joke of the day archives - Check out other old jokes Saturday, 16 May 2015
  • Currently 8.00/10

Rating: 8.0/10 (7)

The goal of the game is to color all the 25 squares. Clicking will invert clors of all the sqauers within the shape of pattern.
The game is designed for all ages and stimulate children's creativity and reasoning.

Two guys were riding in a car,...

Two guys were riding in a car, arguing about how to say the name of the city that they were in. One said "Louieville" and the other "Louiseville." They went on arguing and arguing, until they came upon a fast-food restaurant. The one guy goes inside and says to the waitress, "Tell me the name of the place where I am right now really, really, really slowly." The waitress goes, "Bur-ger-King."
#joke
Joke | Old joke from joke of the day archives - Check out other old jokes Monday, 04 October 2010
  • Currently 5.64/10

Rating: 5.6/10 (28)

Exchange

What do you do with a bachelor who thinks he's God's gift to women?

Exchange him.

Submitted by Calamjo

Edited by Yisman

#joke #short
Joke | Old joke from joke of the day archives - Check out other old jokes Tuesday, 04 October 2011
  • Currently 3.57/10

Rating: 3.6/10 (23)

Preventive medicine belief

Mary: My daughter believes in preventative medicine, doctor.

Doctor: Oh, really?

Mary: Yes, she tries to prevent me from making her take it!

#joke #short #doctor
Joke | Old joke from joke of the day archives - Check out other old jokes Monday, 04 October 2010
  • Currently 5.06/10

Rating: 5.1/10 (18)

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