Jokes of the day for Friday, 21 October 2016

Funny jokes, funny photo and funny video collected from the internet on Friday, 21 October 2016
  • Currently 9.54/10

Rating: 9.5/10 (1626)

A radio announcer was introduc

A radio announcer was introducing a record, "This next one is for Charlotte Burke, who is a hundred and eleven. Hey, Charlotte, that's a ripe old age, isn't it?"
There was a short pause and then the DJ said, "I'm sorry, I got it wrong. This next one is for Charlotte Burke, who is ill."
#joke
Joke | Source: Smilezilla - Daily Jokes and Funny Stories
  • Currently 2.33/10

Rating: 2.3/10 (3)

“I've been eating a

“I've been eating a lot of pasta lately I think it's becoming a part of my daily rotini!”

#joke #short
Joke | Source: Pun of the Day - Funny puns and jokes - the largest collection of humorous puns on the internet. New pun added daily.
  • Currently 2.00/10

Rating: 2.0/10 (4)

Beware of dog

Upon entering the little country store, the stranger noticed a sign saying "DANGER! BEWARE OF DOG!" posted on the glass door. Inside he noticed a harmless old hound dog asleep on the floor besides the cash register.

He asked the store manager, "Is THAT the dog folks are supposed to beware of?"

"Yep, that's him," he replied.

The stranger couldn't help but be amused. "That certainly doesn't look like a dangerous dog to me. Why in the world would you post that sign?"

"Because," the owner replied, "before I posted that sign, people kept tripping over him."

#joke
Joke | Source: Jokes - Used to be - Pacific products joke of the day, but site no longer works.
  • Currently 9.12/10

Rating: 9.1/10 (26)

 One Is Negative One


Theorem: 1 = -1
Proof:
1 = sqrt(1) = sqrt(-1 * -1) = sqrt(-1) * sqrt(-1) = 1^ = -1
Also one can disprove the axiom that things equal to the same thing are equal to each other.
1 = sqrt(1)
-1 = sqrt(1)
Therefore 1 = -1
As an alternative method for solving:
Theorem: 1 = -1
Proof:
x=1
x^2=x
x^2-1=x-1
(x+1)(x-1)=(x-1)
(x+1)=(x-1)/(x-1)
x+1=1
x=0
0=1
=> 0/0=1/1=1

#joke
Joke | Source: Joke of the Day - Jokes served hot and fresh daily.
  • Currently 6.50/10

Rating: 6.5/10 (4)

Funny Photo of the day - Online, no matter where you are

Online, no matter where you are - Sun will give you enough power | Source : Jokes of The Day - By Jokes of the day visitor
  • Currently 9.17/10

Rating: 9.2/10 (6)

The reason there are so many p...

The reason there are so many problems between men and women is that they have such different views of sex and relationships.
Women want a relationship without the complication of unnecessary sex.
Men want sex without the complication of an unnecessary relationship.
#joke
Joke | Old joke from joke of the day archives - Check out other old jokes Thursday, 07 July 2016
  • Currently 6.43/10

Rating: 6.4/10 (14)

Animated GIF - Sitting Fail

Sitting Fail - Sitting Fail - link to page gif is posted initially.
  • Currently 8.33/10

Rating: 8.3/10 (3)

A lawyer walks into a bar and ...

A lawyer walks into a bar and sits down next to a drunk who is closely examining something held in his fingers. The lawyer watches the drunk for a while till he finally gets curious enough to ask what it is.

"Well," said the drunk, "it looks like plastic and feels like rubber."

"Let me have it," said the lawyer. Taking it, he began to roll it between his thumb and forefinger, examining it closely. "Yes," he finally said, "it does look like plastic and feel like rubber, but i don't know what it is. Where did you get it?"

"From my nose," the drunk replied.

#joke #lawyer #walksintoabar
Joke | Old joke from joke of the day archives - Check out other old jokes Wednesday, 21 October 2009
  • Currently 5.62/10

Rating: 5.6/10 (55)

Find number abc

If accab - 31c13 = c10b1 find number abc. Multiple solutions may exist.
CHECK ANSWER
Brain Teasers, puzzles, riddles, mathematical problems, mastermind, cinemania...

Free advice at social affairs?

A doctor and a lawyer were attending a cocktail party when the doctor was approached by a man who asked advice on how to handle his ulcer. The doctor mumbled some medical advice, then turned to the lawyer and remarked, "I never know how to handle the situation when I'm asked for medical advice during a social function. Is it acceptable to send a bill for such advice?" The lawyer replied that it was certainly acceptable to do so.

The next day, the doctor sent the ulcer-stricken man a bill. The lawyer also sent one to the doctor.

#joke #doctor #lawyer
Joke | Old joke from joke of the day archives - Check out other old jokes Friday, 21 October 2011
  • Currently 4.79/10

Rating: 4.8/10 (33)

Damon Wayans: Bicycle Cop

I got pulled over by a bicycle cop in L.A. -- not a motorcycle cop, a bicycle cop. And Im in my car, and he gets out -- hes sweating, hes got these little shorts on. You know how fast you were going? Yeah, a lot faster than that bike.
#joke #short
Joke | Old joke from joke of the day archives - Check out other old jokes Friday, 21 October 2011
  • Currently 4.42/10

Rating: 4.4/10 (24)

There were two guys working fo...

There were two guys working for the city. One would dig a hole -- he would dig, dig, dig.
The other would come behind him and fill the hole -- fill, fill, fill. These two men worked furiously; one digging a hole, the other filling it up again.
A man was watching from the sidewalk and couldn't believe how hard these men were working, but couldn't understand what they were doing. Finally he had to ask them.
He said to the hole digger, "I appreciate how hard you work, but what are you doing? You dig a hole and your partner comes behind you and fills it up again!"
The hole digger replied, "Oh yeah, must look funny, but the guy who plants the trees is sick today."
#joke
Joke | Old joke from joke of the day archives - Check out other old jokes Wednesday, 21 October 2009
  • Currently 7.43/10

Rating: 7.4/10 (21)

Under a tack ....

Driving to work, a gentleman had to swerve to avoid a box that fell out of the truck in front of him. Seconds later, a policeman pulled him over for reckless driving. Fortunately, another office had seen the carton in the road. The policemen stopped traffic and recovered the box. It was found to contain large upholstery tacks.

"I'm sorry, Sir," the first trooper told the driver, "but I am still going to have to write you a ticket."

Amazed, the driver demanded to know the reason.

The trooper replied . . . "Tacks evasion."

#joke #policeman
Joke | Old joke from joke of the day archives - Check out other old jokes Friday, 21 October 2011
  • Currently 4.00/10

Rating: 4.0/10 (15)

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