Jokes of the day for Friday, 11 June 2021

Funny jokes, funny photo and funny video collected from the internet on Friday, 11 June 2021
  • Currently 5.33/10

Rating: 5.3/10 (3)

The man credited with inventin

The man credited with inventing the personal computer has died, due to a failure of his life support machine.
His last words were, "Have you tried switching it off and on again?"
#joke #short
Joke | Source: Smilezilla - Daily Jokes and Funny Stories
  • Currently 7.67/10

Rating: 7.7/10 (6)

Only the Backstroke

Swimming Coach: "Hey! Why are you doing only the backstroke?"
Swimmer: "Because I just ate, sir. I don't want to swim on a full stomach."

#joke #short
Joke | Source: A joke a day - Free Jokes of the Day Clean Funny Jokes via Email, Humor and Entertainment
  • Currently 9.17/10

Rating: 9.2/10 (6)

Two girls....

Two girls were having coffee when one noticed that the other girl seemed troubled and asked her, "Is something bugging you? You look anxious."

"Well, my boyfriend just lost all his money and life savings in the stock market," she explained.

"Oh, that's too bad," the other girl sympathized. "I'm sure you're feeling sorry for him."

"Yeah, I am," she said. "He'll really miss me."

#joke
Joke | Old joke from joke of the day archives - Check out other old jokes Tuesday, 30 June 2015
  • Currently 7.07/10

Rating: 7.1/10 (14)

After Quasimodo's death, the

After Quasimodo's death, the bishop of the Cathedral of Notre Dame sent word through the streets of Paris that a new bell ringer was needed.The bishop decided that he would conduct the interviews personally and went up into the belfry to begin the screening process. After observing several applicants demonstrate their skill, he had decided to call it a day.Just then, an armless man approached him and announced that he was there to apply for the bell ringer's job.
The bishop was incredulous. "You have no arms!"
"No matter," said the man. "Observe!" And he began striking the bells with his face, producing a beautiful melody on the carillon.
The bishop listened in astonishment; convinced he had finally found a replacement for Quasimodo. But suddenly, rushing forward to strike a bell, the armless man tripped and plunged headlong out of the belfry window to his death in the street below.The stunned bishop rushed to his side. When he reached the street, a crowd had gathered around the fallen figure, drawn by the beautiful music they had heard only moments before.As they silently parted to let the bishop through, one of them asked, "Bishop, who was this man?"
"I don't know his name," the bishop sadly replied,
"BUT HIS FACE RINGS A BELL"....
#joke
Joke | Old joke from joke of the day archives - Check out other old jokes Thursday, 11 June 2015
  • Currently 7.13/10

Rating: 7.1/10 (8)

Wide men can't j...

Wide men can't jump.
#joke #short
Joke | Old joke from joke of the day archives - Check out other old jokes Tuesday, 29 December 2009
  • Currently 2.63/10

Rating: 2.6/10 (8)

The 6th grade science teacher...

The 6th grade science teacher, Mrs. Parks, asked her class, "Which human body part increases to ten times its size when stimulated?"

No one answered until little Mary stood up and said, "You should not be asking sixth-graders a question like that! I'm going to tell my parents, and they will go and tell the principal, who will then fire you!"

Mrs. Parks ignored her and asked the question again, "Which body part increases to 10 times its size when stimulated?"

Little Mary's mouth fell open. Then she said to those around her, "Boy, is she going to get in big trouble!"

The teacher continued to ignore her and said to the class, "Anybody?"

Finally, Billy stood up, looked around nervously, and said, "The body part that increases 10 times its size when stimulated is the pupil of the eye."

Mrs. Parks said, "Very good, Billy," then turned to Mary and
continued. "As for you, young lady, I have three things to say: One, you have a dirty mind. Two, you didn't read your homework. And three, one day you are going to be very, very disappointed."
#joke
Joke | Old joke from joke of the day archives - Check out other old jokes Sunday, 11 June 2017
  • Currently 8.94/10

Rating: 8.9/10 (47)

Look carefully the picture a...

Look carefully the picture and guess the game name.
CHECK ANSWER
Brain Teasers, puzzles, riddles, mathematical problems, mastermind, cinemania...

Life is like a box of chocolat...

Life is like a box of chocolates. You never know when Chuck Norris is going to kill you.
#joke #short #chucknorris
Joke | Old joke from joke of the day archives - Check out other old jokes Saturday, 11 June 2011
  • Currently 4.00/10

Rating: 4.0/10 (45)

A woman meets a gorgeous man i...

A woman meets a gorgeous man in a bar. They talk, they connect, they end up leaving together.

They get back to his place, and as he shows her around his apartment, she notices that his bedroom is completely packed with sweet cuddly teddy bears.

Hundreds of cute small bears on a shelf all the way along the floor, cuddly medium-sized ones on a shelf a little higher, and huge, enormous bears on the top shelf along the wall. The woman is kind of surprised that this guy would have a collection of teddy bears, especially one that's so extensive, but she decides not to mention this to him, and is quite impressed by his sensitive side.

She turns to him... they kiss... and then they rip each other's clothes off and make hot steamy love. After an intense night of passion with this sensitive guy, they are lying there together in the afterglow, the woman rolls over and asks, smiling, 'Well, how was it?'

The man says, 'You can have any prize from the bottom shelf.'
#joke
Joke | Old joke from joke of the day archives - Check out other old jokes Saturday, 11 June 2011
  • Currently 5.97/10

Rating: 6.0/10 (36)

Shampoo

How do you keep a blonde in the shower all day?

Give her a bottle of shampoo which says "lather, rinse, repeat."

Submitted by Curtis

Edited by Calamjo

#joke #short #blonde
Joke | Old joke from joke of the day archives - Check out other old jokes Saturday, 11 June 2011
  • Currently 5.88/10

Rating: 5.9/10 (26)

Demetri Martin: Employee of the Month

I think Employee of the Month is a good example of when a person can be a winner and a loser at the same time.
#joke #short
Joke | Old joke from joke of the day archives - Check out other old jokes Monday, 11 June 2012
  • Currently 4.42/10

Rating: 4.4/10 (24)

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