Join us on WhatsApp
Join us on Viber

Jokes of the day for Sunday, 13 June 2021

Funny jokes, funny photo and funny video collected from the internet on Sunday, 13 June 2021

Dig This!

Back in my hippie college days, a professor came up to me in the cafeteria and asked me, "Ya dig?"

I thought to myself, this guy's pretty far out. I answered, "Yeh, man. I dig!"

That's how I got hoodwinked into joining his archaeological expedition.

#joke
Joke | Source: A joke a day - Free Jokes of the Day Clean Funny Jokes via Email, Humor and Entertainment
  • Currently 4.67/10

Rating: 4.7/10 (6)

A gynecologist had become fed

A gynecologist had become fed up with malpractice insurance and was on the verge of being burned out. Hoping to try another career where skillful hands would be beneficial, he decided to change careers and become a mechanic.
He found out from the local technical college what was involved, signed up for evening classes, attended diligently, and learned all he could.
When the time for the practical exam approached, the gynecologist prepared carefully for weeks, and completed the exam with tremendous skill.
When the results came back, he was surprised to find that he had obtained a score of 150%. Fearing an error, he called the instructor, saying "I don't want to appear ungrateful for such an outstanding result, but I was wondering if there had been an error which needed adjusting."
The instructor said, "During the exam, you took the engine apart perfectly, which was worth 50% of the total mark. You put the engine back together again perfectly, which is also worth 50% of the mark."
The instructor went on to say, "I gave you an extra 50% because you did all of it through the muffler."
#joke
Joke | Source: Smilezilla - Daily Jokes and Funny Stories
  • Currently 9.00/10

Rating: 9.0/10 (5)

SLIDESHOW #39 - Funny Photo Slideshow

Three Days After Easter

Following the resurrection, the disciples were still scattered about Jerusalem and the surrounding villages. John finds Peter and runs up to him. Excitedly he says, "Peter, Peter! I've got some good news and some bad news." Peter takes ahold of John and calms him down. "Take it easy, John. What is it? What's the good news?" John says, "The good news is Christ is risen." Peter says, "That's great! But, what's the bad news?" John, looking around, says, "He's really steamed about last Friday."
#joke #friday
Joke | Source: Belief net - Joke of the day, features on religion, spirituality, faith
  • Currently 2.72/10

Rating: 2.7/10 (18)

Breast implants are Pa

Breast implants are Parton parcel of a celebrity career.
#joke #short
Joke | Old joke from joke of the day archives - Check out other old jokes Friday, 21 August 2015
  • Currently 5.33/10

Rating: 5.3/10 (3)

Is that a dog in the back seat?

It was the end of the day when I parked my police car in front of the station. As I gathered my equipment, my K-9 partner, Jake, was barking, and I saw a little boy staring in at me.

"Is that a dog you got in the back seat there?" he asked. "It sure is," I replied.

Puzzled, the boy looked at me and then towards the back of the car. Finally he said, "What'd he do?"

#joke
Joke | Old joke from joke of the day archives - Check out other old jokes Thursday, 02 July 2015
  • Currently 7.71/10

Rating: 7.7/10 (14)

Tom had this problem of gettin...

Tom had this problem of getting up late in the morning and was always late for work. His boss was mad at him and threatened to fire him if he didn't do something about it.
So Tom went to his doctor who gave him a pill and told him to take it before he went to bed. Tom slept well and in fact beat the alarm in the morning. He had a leisurely breakfast and drove cheerfully to work. "Boss", he said, "The pill actually worked!"
"That's all fine" said the boss, "But where were you yesterday?"
#joke #doctor
Joke | Old joke from joke of the day archives - Check out other old jokes Saturday, 13 June 2015
  • Currently 9.33/10

Rating: 9.3/10 (21)

Our Dog Daisy!!

Our dog Daisy, sleeps about 20 hours a day.
Her food prepared for her. She can eat whenever she wants, 24/7/365. Her meals are provided at no cost to her .
She visits the Dr. once a year for her checkup, and again during the year if any medical needs arise.
For this she pays nothing and nothing is required of her. She lives in a nice neighborhood on Park Ave., in an Apartment that is much larger than she needs, and she is not required to do any upkeep.
If she makes a mess, someone else cleans it up.
She has her choice of luxurious places to sleep.
She receives these accommodations absolutely free.
She is living like a Queen, and has absolutely no expenses whatsoever.
All of her costs are picked up by others who go out and earn a living every day.
I was just thinking about all this, and suddenly it hit me like a brick in the head,
............Our dog Daisy is a Democrat!

#joke
Joke | Old joke from joke of the day archives - Check out other old jokes Tuesday, 13 June 2017
  • Currently 4.35/10

Rating: 4.4/10 (79)

Girls with lovely Scottish accent

So I walked into a this bar and heard two girls speaking in what sounded like a lovely Scottish accent. I said: So, are you two girls from Scotland?

One of them said: "Wales Idiot!"

So I said: "Oh, I am terribly sorry about that. So, are you two Whales from Scotland?"

That's the last thing I remember.

#joke #walksintoabar
Joke | Old joke from joke of the day archives - Check out other old jokes Thursday, 13 June 2019
  • Currently 8.97/10

Rating: 9.0/10 (66)

Female hormones in beer

Yesterday, scientists in the United States revealed that beer contains small traces of female hormones.

To prove their theory, they fed one hundred men twelve pints of beer and observed that 100% of them started talking nonsense and couldn't drive.

#joke #short #beer
Joke | Old joke from joke of the day archives - Check out other old jokes Sunday, 13 June 2010
  • Currently 5.30/10

Rating: 5.3/10 (60)

Dane Cook: Time Travel

Know what I would like to do? Id travel back to when my mom and dad had sex to have me. And Id just run into the bedroom, right when theyre doing it, and just spank my dad on the ass: Im your son from the future!
#joke #short
Joke | Old joke from joke of the day archives - Check out other old jokes Monday, 13 June 2011
  • Currently 3.22/10

Rating: 3.2/10 (54)

Why English Is Tough

Twenty-one reasons why English is hard to learn.
1. The bandage was wound around the wound.
2. The farm was used to produce produce.
3. The dump was so full it had to refuse more refuse.
4. We must polish the Polish furniture.
5. He could lead if he would get the lead out.
6. The soldier decided to desert his dessert in the desert.
7. Since there was no time like the present, he thought it was time to present the present.
8. A bass was painted on the head of the bass drum.
9. When shot at, the dove dove into the bushes.
10. I did not object to the object.
11. The insurance was invalid for the invalid.
12. There was a row among the oarsmen on how to row.
13. They were too close to the door to close it.
14. The buck does funny things when does are present.
15. A seamstress and a sewer fell down into a sewer line.
16. To help with planting, the farmer taught his sow to sow.
17. The wind was too strong to wind the sail.
18. After a number of injections my jaw got number.
19. Upon seeing the tear in the painting I shed a tear.
20. I had to subject the subject to a series of tests.
21. How can I intimate this to my most intimate friend?
#joke
Joke | Old joke from joke of the day archives - Check out other old jokes Wednesday, 13 June 2018
  • Currently 8.09/10

Rating: 8.1/10 (45)

I get so drunk that I imagine things

The drunk was floundering down the alley carrying a box with holes on the side. He bumped into a friend who asked, "What do you have in there, pal?"

"A mongoose."

"What for?"

"Well, you know how drunk I can get. When I get drunk I see snakes, and I'm scared to death of snakes. That's why I got this mongoose, for protection."

"But," the friend said, "you idiot! Those are imaginary snakes."

"That's okay," said the drunk, showing his friend the interior of the box, "So is the mongoose."

#joke
Joke | Old joke from joke of the day archives - Check out other old jokes Friday, 14 August 2009
  • Currently 5.64/10

Rating: 5.6/10 (33)

I'd tell you a chem...

“I'd tell you a chemistry joke but I know I wouldn't get a reaction.”

#joke #short
Joke | Old joke from joke of the day archives - Check out other old jokes Wednesday, 18 March 2015
  • Currently 6.44/10

Rating: 6.4/10 (9)

The Right Amount

Do you ever wonder...
Why is no one ever the right amount of whelmed?

#joke #short
Joke | Source: A joke a day - Free Jokes of the Day Clean Funny Jokes via Email, Humor and Entertainment
  • Currently 8.44/10

Rating: 8.4/10 (9)

Better

It's better to be absolutely ridiculous than absolutely boring.

#joke #short
Joke | Old joke from joke of the day archives - Check out other old jokes Sunday, 07 June 2015
  • Currently 7.50/10

Rating: 7.5/10 (2)

Jokes Archive

NOTE: All jokes on this web site are property of the sites they are collected from. Web site Jokes of the day is not responsible for content of jokes. We are not trying to offend, just looking for a good laugh!! If you are offended by any of the jokes, please complain to the site jokes are coming from.
This site uses cookies to store information on your computer. Some are essential to help the site properly. Others give us insight into how the site is used and help us to optimize the user experience. See our privacy policy.