A man goes to the doctor feeli...

A man goes to the doctor feeling unwell. The doctor examines him and says: "You're suffering from Alice."
"What's that?" asks the man.

"I don't know," says the doctor, "But Christopher Robin went down with it"
Mrs C Smith, Penicuik

Did you hear about the man who bought a dog with no legs?

He called it cigarette. He used to take it out for a drag.

Neil Sutton, Corstorphine

Once upon a time there were two muffins in the microwave. Suddenly, one of the muffins said: "Man it's hot in here."

The other muffin exclaimed: "Look, a talking muffin!"

Tony White, Loanhead

Why does a room full of married people looks so empty?

There's not a single person in it . . .

Mark Allan, Niddrie

What do you call a boom-a-rang, that doesn't come back?

A Stick.

Eric Stevenson, Leith

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The full article contains 162 words and appears in Edinburgh Evening News newspaper.
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