The best jokes (1 to 10)

The best jokes rated by site visitors. Top rated jokes. These are the best jokes rated 1 to 10. NOTE jokes sometimes might seem not to be in order. Due to better performance joke top list is refreshed only once daily.
  • Currently 9.54/10

Rating: 9.5/10 (122274)

Pickup truck full of penguins...

A police officer sees a man driving around with a pickup truck full of penguins. He pulls the guy over and says, "You can't drive around with penguins in this town! Take them to the zoo immediately."

The guy obliges and drives away.

The next day, the officer sees the same guy driving around with the truck full of penguins again. This time, though, all the penguins are wearing sunglasses.

The police officer pulls the guy over and says, "I thought I told you to take these penguins to the zoo yesterday?"

The guy replies, "I did, and today I'm taking them to the beach."

#joke
Joke | Source: http://www.pacprod.com/ - Pacific products joke of the day
  • Currently 9.55/10

Rating: 9.5/10 (11)

A lawyer and two friends, a ra

A lawyer and two friends, a rabbi and a Hindu holy man, had car trouble in the countryside and asked to spend the night with a farmer.
The farmer said, "There might be a problem; you see, I only have room for two to sleep, so one of you must sleep in the barn."
"No problem," chimed the rabbi. "My people wandered in the desert for forty years. I am humble enough to sleep in the barn for an evening."
With that, he departed to the barn and the others bedded down for the night.
Moments later, a knock was heard at the door, and the farmer opened it. There stood the rabbi from the barn.
"What's wrong?" asked the farmer.
He replied, "I'm grateful to you, but I can't sleep in the barn. There is a pig in the barn, and my faith believes that is an unclean animal."
His Hindu friend agreed to swap places with him. But a few minutes later, the same scene recurred. There was a knock on the door.
"What's wrong now?" the farmer asked.
The Hindu holy man replied, "I too am grateful for your helping us out, but there is a cow in the barn, and in my country cows are considered sacred. I can't sleep on holy ground!"
Well, that left only the lawyer to make the change. He grumbled and complained, but he went out to the barn.
Moments later, there was another knock on the farmer's door.
Frustrated and tired, the farmer opened the door, and there stood ... the pig and the cow.
#joke #lawyer
Joke | Source: Smilezilla - Daily Jokes and Funny Stories
  • Currently 9.17/10

Rating: 9.2/10 (6)

Insurance

Larry's barn burned down and his wife, Susan, called the insurance company.

Susan spoke to the insurance agent and said, "We had that barn insured for fifty thousand, and I want my money."

The agent replied, "Whoa there, just a minute. Insurance doesn't work quite like that. An independent adjuster will assess the value of what was insured, and then we'll provide you with a new barn of similar worth."

There was a long pause, and then Susan replied, "If that's how it works, then I want to cancel the life insurance policy on my husband."

#joke
Joke | Source: http://www.pacprod.com/ - Pacific products joke of the day
  • Currently 9.00/10

Rating: 9.0/10 (5)

An absent-minded husband thoug...

An absent-minded husband thought he had conquered his problem of trying to remember his wife's birthday and their anniversary.
He opened an account with a florist, provided that florist with the dates and instructions to send flowers to his wife on these dates along with an appropriate note signed, "Your loving husband."
His wife was thrilled by this new display of attention and all went well until one day, when he came home, kissed his wife and said offhandedly, "Nice flowers, honey. Where'd you get them?"
#joke
Joke | Source: Smilezilla - Daily Jokes and Funny Stories
  • Currently 8.75/10

Rating: 8.8/10 (4)

Look carefully the picture a...

Look carefully the picture and guess the game name.
CHECK ANSWER
Brain Teasers, puzzles, riddles, mathematical problems, mastermind, cinemania...

The salesman was demonstrating...

The salesman was demonstrating unbreakable combs in the department store. He was impressing the people who stopped by to look by putting the comb through all sorts of torture and stress.
Finally to impress even the skeptics in the crowd, he bent the comb completely in half, and it snapped with a loud crack. Without missing a beat, he bravely held up both halves of the 'unbreakable' comb for everyone to see and said,
"And this, ladies and gentlemen, is what an unbreakable comb looks like on the inside..."
#joke
Joke | Source: Smilezilla - Daily Jokes and Funny Stories
  • Currently 8.75/10

Rating: 8.8/10 (4)

The goal of the game is to color all the 25 squares. Clicking will invert clors of all the sqauers within the shape of pattern.
The game is designed for all ages and stimulate children's creativity and reasoning.

Heaven or ???

A spiritualist who'd recently been widowed met a colleague and reported excitedly that she'd just received a message from her dead husband - asking her to send him a pack of cigarettes.

"The only thing is," she mused, "that I don't know where to send them."

"Why not?" asked her friend.

"Well, he didn't actually say that he was in Heaven - but I can't imagine he'd be in Hell."

"Hm," responded the friend. "Well, maybe I shouldn't bring this up, but. . . he didn't mention anything about including matches in the package, did he?"

#joke
Joke | Source: http://www.pacprod.com/ - Pacific products joke of the day
  • Currently 8.75/10

Rating: 8.8/10 (4)

A red blood count is...

“A red blood count is a communist vampire.”

#joke #short
Joke | Source: Pun of the Day - Funny puns and jokes - the largest collection of humorous puns on the internet. New pun added daily.
  • Currently 8.75/10

Rating: 8.8/10 (4)

 What Do You Do

what do you do when a blonde throws a grenade at you? pull out the pin and throw it back
what do you do when a blode throws a pin at you? run like hell shes got a grenade in her mouth!!
#joke #short #blonde
Joke | Source: Joke of the Day - Jokes served hot and fresh daily.
  • Currently 7.20/10

Rating: 7.2/10 (5)

Father: Son, today is your exa...

Father: Son, today is your exam. If you fail, that's it, don't ever call me your father again. Got it?
Son: Okay dad! I'll do my best!
After the exam..
Father: So, how's the exam?
Son: Sorry Sir, do I know you?
#joke #short
Joke | Source: A joke a day - Free Jokes of the Day Clean Funny Jokes via Email, Humor and Entertainment
  • Currently 6.17/10

Rating: 6.2/10 (6)

You have to stay in shape...

You have to stay in shape. My mother started walking five miles a day when she was 60.
She's 97 now and... we have no idea where she is.
#joke #short
Joke | Source: Smilezilla - Daily Jokes and Funny Stories
  • Currently 9.00/10

Rating: 9.0/10 (5)

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