Jokes of the day for Thursday, 20 May 2021

Funny jokes, funny photo and funny video collected from the internet on Thursday, 20 May 2021
  • Currently 7.50/10

Rating: 7.5/10 (2)

Why is Michael Jackson so craz

Why is Michael Jackson so crazy?
#joke #short
Joke | Source: Pun Gents - Daily Jokes, One-liners, Groaners, Puns of the day :: Puns on Demand :: Punshine Girls and Boys!
  • Currently 1.31/10

Rating: 1.3/10 (13)

A man was driving a rig in a l

A man was driving a rig in a long line of tractor-trailers when a police officer pulled him over for speeding. Astounded that he alone was caught, he asked, "Out of all these trucks that were going just as fast as I was, why did you pull me over?"
"Have you ever gone fishing?" the officer asked.
"Yes," Walt replied.
"Well, have you ever caught all the fish in the pond?"
#joke
Joke | Source: Smilezilla - Daily Jokes and Funny Stories
  • Currently 3.75/10

Rating: 3.8/10 (8)

Happiness vs Misery

Happiness is walking through the green grass barefoot....
Misery is walking through the green grass barefoot and then discovering it's a cow pasture.

#joke #short
Joke | Source: A joke a day - Free Jokes of the Day Clean Funny Jokes via Email, Humor and Entertainment
  • Currently 3.60/10

Rating: 3.6/10 (5)

Miracle mile

A priest is driving down to New York and gets stopped for speeding in Connecticut. The state trooper smells alcohol on the priest's breath and then sees an empty wine bottle on the floor of the car.

He says, "Sir, have you been drinking?"

"Just water," says the priest. The trooper says, "Then why do I smell wine?"

The priest looks at the bottle and says, "Good Lord! He's done it again!"

#joke
Joke | Old joke from joke of the day archives - Check out other old jokes Monday, 08 June 2015
  • Currently 8.77/10

Rating: 8.8/10 (26)

A pastor's wife was expecting...

A pastor's wife was expecting a baby, so he stood before the congregation and asked for a raise. After much discussion, they passed a rule that whenever the preacher's family expanded, so would his paycheck.
After 6 children, this started to get expensive and the congregation decided to hold another meeting to discuss the preacher's expanding salary. A great deal of yelling and inner bickering ensued, as to how much the clergyman's additional children were costing the church, and how much more it could potentially cost.
After listening to them for about an hour, the pastor rose from his chair and spoke, 'Children are a gift from God, and we will take as many gifts as He gives us'.
Silence fell on the congregation.
In the back pew, a little old lady struggled to stand, and finally said in her frail voice, 'Rain is also a gift from God, but when we get too much of it, we wear rubbers.'
The entire congregation said, 'Amen.'
#joke
Joke | Old joke from joke of the day archives - Check out other old jokes Wednesday, 20 May 2015
  • Currently 8.16/10

Rating: 8.2/10 (37)

Riding Nun’s

Two nuns are riding their bikes down the back streets of Rome.

One says breathlessly, "I've never come this way before!"

To which the other replies, "It's the cobblestones."

#joke #short
Joke | Old joke from joke of the day archives - Check out other old jokes Monday, 03 November 2014
  • Currently 6.25/10

Rating: 6.3/10 (16)

What a winning combination?

The computer chose a secret code (sequence of 4 digits from 1 to 6). Your goal is to find that code. Black circles indicate the number of hits on the right spot. White circles indicate the number of hits on the wrong spot.
CHECK ANSWER
Brain Teasers, puzzles, riddles, mathematical problems, mastermind, cinemania...

A guy was in a cave, looking f...

A guy was in a cave, looking for treasure. He found an old lamp, rubbed it, and a genie came out. The genie said "I will grant you three wishes, but your ex-wife will get double." The man agreed, and said "I wish I had a mansion." The genie granted it, and his ex-wife got two mansions. The man said "I would like a million dollars." The genie again granted it and his ex-wife got two million dollars. Then the man said, "Scare me half to death."
#joke
Joke | Old joke from joke of the day archives - Check out other old jokes Friday, 20 May 2011
  • Currently 6.93/10

Rating: 6.9/10 (44)

Mike Vecchione: Favorite Place to Taser

My favorite place to taser people: the Renaissance Fair. The Renaissance Fair cause it makes me feel like an evil wizard from the future.
#joke #short
Joke | Old joke from joke of the day archives - Check out other old jokes Friday, 20 May 2011
  • Currently 5.07/10

Rating: 5.1/10 (42)

Chuck Norris was once on Celeb...

Chuck Norris was once on Celebrity Wheel of Fortune and was the first to spin. The next 29 minutes of the show consisted of everyone standing around awkwardly, waiting for the wheel to stop.
#joke #short #chucknorris
Joke | Old joke from joke of the day archives - Check out other old jokes Sunday, 20 May 2012
  • Currently 3.62/10

Rating: 3.6/10 (42)

A pastor's wife was expecting...

A pastor's wife was expecting a baby, so he stood before the congregation and asked for a raise. After much discussion, they passed a rule that whenever the preacher's family expanded, so would his paycheck.
After 6 children, this started to get expensive and the congregation decided to hold another meeting to discuss the preacher's expanding salary. A great deal of yelling and inner bickering ensued, as to how much the clergyman's additional children were costing the church, and how much more it could potentially cost.
After listening to them for about an hour, the pastor rose from his chair and spoke, 'Children are a gift from God, and we will take as many gifts as He gives us'.
Silence fell on the congregation.
In the back pew, a little old lady struggled to stand, and finally said in her frail voice, 'Rain is also a gift from God, but when we get too much of it, we wear rubbers.'
The entire congregation said, 'Amen.'
#joke
Joke | Old joke from joke of the day archives - Check out other old jokes Wednesday, 20 May 2015
  • Currently 8.16/10

Rating: 8.2/10 (37)

Rowing Your Boat

Two blondes were driving along a road by a wheat field when they saw a blonde in the middle of the field rowing a row boat.

The driver blonde turned to her friend and said "You know - it's blondes like that that give us a bad name!"

To this, the other blonde replies "I know it, and if I knew how to swim, I'd go out there and drown her."

#joke #blonde
Joke | Old joke from joke of the day archives - Check out other old jokes Sunday, 20 May 2012
  • Currently 6.03/10

Rating: 6.0/10 (30)

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