Jokes of the day for Sunday, 28 October 2012

Funny jokes, funny photo and funny video collected from the internet on Sunday, 28 October 2012
  • Currently 9.53/10

Rating: 9.5/10 (62)

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Rider

After a round of golf, four ladies sat around the club house, chatting.
Seeing the ladies, the Pro approached them and asked: "How did your game go?
The first lady, a brunette, said she had a good round ... making the comment that she actually had 25 riders. The Pro was a bit perplexed not knowing what a "Rider" was.
The second was a blonde lady who quickly chimed in and said that she had a very good round as well with 16 riders.
The third lady then said that her round was average and that she only had 10 riders.
The fourth lady admitted that she played the worst round of the day and that she only had 2 riders all day long.
The Pro was completely confused not knowing what the term "rider" meant. But, because he didn't want to look dumb, he made a quick polite remark, wished the ladies well and then left.
He then approached the bartender and asked "Hey, can you tell me what these ladies are talking about when they refer to "Riders"?"

golf cart in the green

The bartender simply smiled and said..."A 'Rider" is when you hit a shot long enough to ride on the golf cart to your ball.

#joke #blonde
  • Currently 6.40/10

Rating: 6.4/10 (5)

Really funny jokes-Boy baby

In the maternity ward of a hospital, new-born girl baby looks over at new-born boy baby and asks, "Are you a girl baby or a boy baby?"
The boy baby quickly chirps up, "I'm a boy baby!"
"How can you tell?" asks girl baby.
"Easy," says boy baby. And, with that, he threw off the blankets, hoisted up his itty-bitty night-shirt and proudly pointed downward. "See.....blue booties"
#joke
Joke | Source: Really Funny Jokes - Really Funny jokes, adult jokes, Good jokes, short funny jokes, teacher jokes, affair jokes, kids jokes, doctor jokes, funny pictures
  • Currently 5.50/10

Rating: 5.5/10 (2)

Funny video of the day - Amusing driving

Amusing driving - Why be bored while driving? - link to page video is posted initially.
  • Currently 6.50/10

Rating: 6.5/10 (2)

Making A Donation

A man and a woman were waiting at the hospital donation

center.

Man: "What are you doing here today?"

Woman: "Oh, I`m here to donate some blood. They`re going to

give me $5 for it."

Man: "Hmm, that`s interesting. I`m here to donate sperm,

myself. But they pay me $25."

The woman looked thoughtful for a moment and they chatted

some more before going their separate ways.

Several months later, the same man and woman meet again in

the donation center.

Man: "Oh, hi there! Here to donate blood again?"

Woman: [shaking her head with mouth closed] "Unh unh."

#joke
  • Currently 5.83/10

Rating: 5.8/10 (12)

Family Bible

A little boy opened the big and old family Bible with fascination, looking at the old pages as he turned them. Then something fell out, and he picked it up and looked at it closely. It was an old leaf from a tree that had been pressed in between the pages.

“Momma, look what I found,” the boy called out.

“What have you got there, dear?” his mother asked.

With astonishment in the his voice, he answered, “It's Adam's Suit!”

#joke
Joke | Old joke from joke of the day archives - Check out other old jokes Saturday, 22 September 2012
  • Currently 4.74/10

Rating: 4.7/10 (38)

Funny Photo of the day - Is it a boat, or car?

Is it a boat, or car? - Or just photoshop? | Source : Jokes of The Day - By Jokes of the day visitor
  • Currently 3.83/10

Rating: 3.8/10 (6)

Chuck Norris qualified with a ...

Chuck Norris qualified with a top speed of 324 mph at the Daytona 500, without a car.
#joke #short #chucknorris
Joke | Old joke from joke of the day archives - Check out other old jokes Saturday, 19 May 2012
  • Currently 5.69/10

Rating: 5.7/10 (13)

A pilot landed a plane with a ...

A pilot landed a plane with a rather bumpy landing. As part of his job he was required to stand by the terminal door and say goodbye to the passengers as they exited the airplane. He was afraid that someone might say something about his rather less than perfect landing, but everyone left without saying a word except for one passenger, an elderly lady, she slowly approached the pilot after most passengers had exited the plane and asked, "Did we land? Or were we shot down?"
#joke
Joke | Old joke from joke of the day archives - Check out other old jokes Saturday, 30 October 2010
  • Currently 3.78/10

Rating: 3.8/10 (9)

Calculate the number 4248

NUMBERMANIA: Calculate the number 4248 using numbers [2, 8, 2, 5, 32, 501] and basic arithmetic operations (+, -, *, /). Each of the numbers can be used only once.
CHECK ANSWER
Brain Teasers, puzzles, riddles, mathematical problems, mastermind, cinemania...

A frog walks into a bank. He g...

A frog walks into a bank. He goes to the only open teller, and sees that her name is Paddy Whack. "Hey, listen" says the frog. "I really need a loan! I'm out of work, and my wife and tadpoles are at home starving! I need money so I can feed them and provide for them!"

Now Paddy feels very sorry for the poor frog and asks him if he has any collateral. He holds up a small glass elephant. Paddy is a little surprised by this, and quite unsure, but she feels so sorry for the the poor frog that she takes the elephant to her manager. "Mr. Manager, sir," Paddy begins "there is a frog out there who deperately needs a loan. He's out of work and he has a wife and tadpoles who are at home starving. He needs some money so he can provide for them! But all he has for collateral is this little glass elephant. What should I do?"

Well, Mr. Manager takes a good hard look at that elephant, thinks about it a little, and then replies, "It's a knick-knack, Paddy Whack, give the frog a loan!"

#joke
Joke | Old joke from joke of the day archives - Check out other old jokes Thursday, 31 December 2009
  • Currently 5.38/10

Rating: 5.4/10 (77)

Faith....

Two nuns were driving down a country road when they ran out of gas. They walked to a farmhouse and a farmer gave them some gasoline; but the only container he had was an old bedpan. The nuns were happy to take whatever they were offered and returned to their car. As they were pouring the gasoline from the bedpan into the tank of their car, a minister drove by. He stopped, rolled down his window and said, "Excuse me, sisters. I'm not of your religion, but I couldn't help admiring your faith....!"

#joke
Joke | Old joke from joke of the day archives - Check out other old jokes Wednesday, 11 November 2009
  • Currently 4.14/10

Rating: 4.1/10 (7)

A dentist was getting ready to...

A dentist was getting ready to clean an elderly lady's teeth. He noticed that she was a little nervous, so he began to tell her a story as he was putting on his surgical gloves...

"Do you know how they make these rubber gloves?" She said, "No?"

"Well", he spoofed, "down in Mexico they have this big building set up with a large tank of latex, and the workers are all picked according to hand size. Each individual walks up to the tank, dips their hands in, and then walk around for a bit while the latex sets up and dries right onto their hands! Then they peel off the gloves and throw them into the big 'Finished Goods Crate' and start the process all over again."

And she didn't laugh a bit!!! Five minutes later, during the procedure, he had to stop cleaning her teeth because she burst out laughing.

The old woman blushed and exclaimed, "I just suddenly thought about how they must make condoms!"

#joke
Joke | Old joke from joke of the day archives - Check out other old jokes Wednesday, 28 October 2009
  • Currently 5.18/10

Rating: 5.2/10 (57)

Cory Kahaney: Handling Halloween

Halloween is pay day, folks. A lot of parents are strange; they say, Ration the candy. I say, Let them eat as much as they want -- they throw up, the rest is mine. Thats how I handle Halloween.
#joke #short #halloween
Joke | Old joke from joke of the day archives - Check out other old jokes Friday, 28 October 2011
  • Currently 5.14/10

Rating: 5.1/10 (21)

Going to the movies

Why do folks from Arkansas go to the movie theater in groups of 18 or more?

17 and under are not admitted.

#joke #short
Joke | Old joke from joke of the day archives - Check out other old jokes Friday, 28 October 2011
  • Currently 3.92/10

Rating: 3.9/10 (13)

Chuck Norris can eat just one ...

Chuck Norris can eat just one Lay's potato chip.
#joke #short #chucknorris
Joke | Old joke from joke of the day archives - Check out other old jokes Friday, 28 October 2011
  • Currently 4.42/10

Rating: 4.4/10 (12)

Donnell Rawlings: Black Gummi Bear

I want a black Gummi Bear. You ever see a black Gummi Bear? No, because Gummi Bears are as racist as hell. They come in every color but black. They got orange, yellow, green, invisible -- come on. They must have got somebody on the candy committee like, We gave you n*****s a jelly bean nobody eats. Were not going to take a chance on a Gummi Bear.
#joke
Joke | Old joke from joke of the day archives - Check out other old jokes Thursday, 28 October 2010
  • Currently 3.75/10

Rating: 3.8/10 (12)

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