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Jokes of the day
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Jokes of the day - daily portion of jokes. New jokes every day. Joke of the day archive is updated every day. Funny photo is updated daily. Funny video is updated daily. Links to great joke archives. Big archive of old jokes of the day, top rated jokes of the day. Jokes of the day are updated daily, bringing updated jokes. Rate jokes of the day.
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Jokes of the day for Wednesday, Mar the 4th 2009
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Who owns the cows? |
| After his graduation from college, the son of a Spanish lawyer was considering his future. He went to his father and asked if he might be given a desk in the corner from which he could observe his fatherâs activities and be introduced to his fatherâs clients as a clerk. His observations would help him decide whether or not to become a lawyer. His father thought this was a great idea and immediately helped to set it up.
The first client the next morning was a tenant farmer--a rough man with calloused hands who was dressed in workmanâs clothing. He said,
"Mr. Lawyer, I work for the Gonzales farm on the east side of town. For many years I have tended their crops and animals, including some cows. I have raised the cows, fed them and looked after them. And I was always given the understanding and the belief that I was the owner of these cows. Now Mr. Gonzales has died and his son has inherited the farm. He believes that since the cows were raised on his land and ate his hay, the cows are his. In short, we are in dispute over who owns the cows."
The lawyer said, "Thank you. I have heard enough. I will take your case. Don't worry about the cows!"
The next client to come in, a young and well-dressed young man, was obviously a landowner. He said, "My name is Gonzales and I own a farm on the east side of town. We have a tenant farmer who has worked for my family for many years, tending crops and the animals, including some cows. I believe the cows belong to me because they were raised on my land and were fed my hay. But the tenant farmer believes they are his because he raised them and cared for them. In short, we are in dispute over who owns the cows."
The lawyer said, "Thank you. I have heard enough. I will take your case. Don't worry about the cows!"
After the client left, the lawyerâs son could not help but express his concern. "Father, I know very little about the law, but it seems we have a very serious problem concerning these cows."
"Donât worry about the cows!" the lawyer said. "The cows will be ours!" |
Permalink | Source : The Bartender's guide - Jokes, Drinks, and Poker
Rating: 5.0/10 (1 vote cast) |
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You Might Be A Redneck If 47 |
You might be a redneck if...
On your first date you had to ask your Dad to borrow the keys to the tractor.
Your parakeet knows the phrase "Open up, Police!"
You saved lots of money on your honeymoon by going deer hunting.
In tough situations you ask yourself, "What would Curly do?"
Taking your wife on a cruise means circling the Dairy Queen.
You think the last words to the Star Spangled Banner are "Play Ball..."
You have a color coordinating rope that ties down your car hood.
You bring your dog to work with you.
Your grandmother can correctly execute the sleeper hold.
You've ever held somebody up with a caulk gun.
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Permalink | Source : Joke of the Day - Jokes served hot and fresh daily.
Rating: 6.0/10 (3 votes cast) |
| Last week I moved into my new apartment. It was so small, I had to scrape off the wallpaper to get the furniture inside. |
Permalink | Source : Click The City - Philippine's Leading Lifestyle and Entertainment Guide.
Rating: 5.5/10 (2 votes cast) |
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jokes of the day ads
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Doctor, doctor, I feel like a £10 note.
Go and buy something then â the change will do you good.
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Permalink | Source : http://news.scotsman.com/ - Joke of the day
Rating: 5.8/10 (5 votes cast) |
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Old flame... |
A couple was dining out when the wife noticed a familiar face at the bar. She recognized him as an old flame.
"Honey," she said to her husband, as she pointed out the man, "that guy at the bar has been drinking like that since I left him seven years ago."
Her husband said, "That's silly, no one celebrates that much!" |
Permalink | Source : http://www.pacprod.com/ - Pacific products joke of the day
Rating: 4.5/10 (2 votes cast) |
One morning while making breakfast, a man walks up to his wife and pinches her on her butt and says, "You know if you firmed this up we could get rid of your girdle."
While this was on the edge of intolerable, she thought herself better and replied with silence.
The next morning the man woke his wife with a pinch on the breast and said, "You know if you firmed these up we could get rid of your bra."
This was beyond a silence response, so she rolled over and grabbed him by the penis. With a death grip in place she said, "You know if you firmed this up we could get rid of your brother". |
Permalink | Source : Joke rating machine - Jokes in categories, joke of the day by categories
Rating: 5.3/10 (3 votes cast) |
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jokes of the day ads
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jokes of the day ads
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A Recently Spotted Bumper Sticker:
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"God's true name is unpronounceable...because God is Welsh." |
Permalink | Source : Belief net - Joke of the day, features on religion, spirituality, faith
Rating: 4.3/10 (3 votes cast) |
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Senior Citizen |
| Two businessmen in Florida were sitting down for a break in their soon-to-be new store. As yet, the store wasn't ready, with only a few shelves set up. One said to the other, ' I bet any minute now some senior citizen is going to walk by, put his face to the window, and ask what we're selling.' |
Permalink | Source : jokes warehouse - Animal jokes, Blonde jokes, doctor jokes, drunk jokes and jokes of the day
Rating: 5.0/10 (1 vote cast) |
Q: Have you ever smelled mothballs?
A: Well, how did you spread their tiny legs? |
Permalink | Source : Comedy.com - The World Famous Comedy.com Daily Joke!
Rating: 6.8/10 (5 votes cast) |
| In the courtroom the judge is asking the little boy, "Do you want to live with your mother?" The little boy says, "No, she beats me." The judge says, "Do you want to live with your father?" "No, he beats me too," says the little boy. The judge scratches his head and says, "Ok, son, then who do you want to live with?" Without a moment's hesitation the boy says loudly, "The Houston Astros, because they don't beat anybody." |
Permalink | Source : Australia, India, Sri Lanka - Australian Joke of the day
Rating: 6.0/10 (7 votes cast) |
After she woke up, a woman told her husband, "I just dreamed that you gave me a pearl necklace for Valentine's day. What do you think it means?"
"You'll know tonight." he said.
That evening, the man came home with a small package and gave it to his wife. Delighted, she opened it to find a book entitled "The Meaning of Dreams" |
Permalink | Source : Kiwi box - today's pick Joke of the day
Rating: 7.1/10 (7 votes cast) |
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