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Jokes of the day
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Jokes of the day - daily portion of jokes. New jokes every day. Joke of the day archive is updated every day. Funny photo is updated daily. Funny video is updated daily. Links to great joke archives. Big archive of old jokes of the day, top rated jokes of the day. Jokes of the day are updated daily, bringing updated jokes. Rate jokes of the day.
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Jokes of the day for Tuesday, Jul the 21st 2009
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Pay the Price |
A man walks into a bar and says,
"Excuse me, Id like a pint of beer."
The bartender serves the drink and
says, "Thatll be four dollars."
The customer pulls out a twenty-dollar
bill and hands it to the bartender.
"Sorry, sir," the bartender
says, "but I cant accept that."
The man pulls out a ten-dollar bill and the
bartender rejects his money again. "Whats going on here?" the man asks.
Pointing to a neon sign, the bartender
explains, "This is a Singles Bar." |
Permalink | Source : Comedy Central: Jokes - Jokes provided daily from Comedy Central's archive.
Rating: 0.0/10 (0 votes cast) |
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What did the blondes |
| What did the blondes right leg say to the left leg? Nothing, they haven't met! |
Permalink | Source : The Bartender's guide - Jokes, Drinks, and Poker
Rating: 0.0/10 (0 votes cast) |
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Knock Knock Collection 177 |
Knock Knock
Who's there?
Thumb!
Thumb who?
Thumb like it hot and thumb like it cold!
Knock Knock
Who's there?
Thumpin!
Thumping who?
Thumping green and slimy is climbing up your back!
Knock Knock
Who's there?
Thurston!
Thurston who?
Thurston and hungerin'!
Knock Knock
Who's there?
Tibet!
Tibet who?
Early Tibet and early to rise!
Knock Knock
Who's there?
Tinker Bell!
Tinker Bell who?
Tinker Bell is out of order!
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Permalink | Source : Joke of the Day - Jokes served hot and fresh daily.
Rating: 0.0/10 (0 votes cast) |
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A few years in the desert... |
A judge was punishing three men because they had committed a crime. Their sentence was a few years in the desert. He said that they could each take one thing with them.
The first guy decides to take an umbrella, so that he can have shade whenever he wants.
The second guy decides to take a water bottle so that he won't get thirsty.
Finally, the third guy decides to take a car door.
The judge asked, "Why in the world would you want to take a car door?" The man replies, "Just in case it gets hot, I can roll down the window." |
Permalink | Source : http://www.pacprod.com/ - Pacific products joke of the day
Rating: 0.0/10 (0 votes cast) |
A woman got on a bus holding a baby. The bus driver said, "That's the ugliest baby I've ever seen."
In a huff, the woman slammed her fare into the fare box and took an aisle seat near the rear of the bus.
The man seated next to her sensed that she was agitated and asked her what was wrong.
"The bus driver insulted me," she fumed.
The man sympathized and said, "Why, he's a public servant and shouldn't say things to insult passengers."
"You're right!" the woman said, "I think I'll go back up there and give him a piece of my mind!"
"That's a good idea," the man said, "Here, let me hold your monkey." |
Permalink | Source : Joke rating machine - Jokes in categories, joke of the day by categories
Rating: 0.0/10 (0 votes cast) |
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| Dear Abby: I am forty-four years old and I would like to meet a man my age with no bad habits. Rose
Dear Rose: So would I. Abby |
Permalink | Source : Dos santos online - Not joke related site, but with joke of the day
Rating: 5.5/10 (2 votes cast) |
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The Senility Prayer
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God, grant me the senility to forget the people I never liked anyway, the good fortune to run into the ones that I do like, and the eyesight to tell the difference.
This joke was reprinted from "Laugh Yourself Healthy" by Charles and Frances Hunter, with permission of Strang Communications. Copyright 2008. All rights reserved. |
Permalink | Source : Belief net - Joke of the day, features on religion, spirituality, faith
Rating: 2.0/10 (4 votes cast) |
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Tribe |
| A young Native American woman went to a doctor for her first ever physical exam. After checking all of her vitals and running the usual tests, the doctor said, "Well, Running Doe, you are in fine health. I could find no problems. I did notice one abnormality however." |
Permalink | Source : jokes warehouse - Animal jokes, Blonde jokes, doctor jokes, drunk jokes and jokes of the day
Rating: 0.0/10 (0 votes cast) |
An elderly couple had dinner at another couple's house, and after
eating,the wives left the table and went into the kitchen.
The two gentlemen were talking, and one said, 'Last night we went
out to a new restaurant and it was really great. I would recommend
it very highly.'
The other man said, 'What is the name of the restaurant?'
The first man thought and thought and finally said, 'What is the name
of that flower you give to someone you love?
You know... The one that's red and has thorns.'
'Do you mean a rose?'
'Yes, that's the one,' replied the man. He then turned towards the
kitchen and yelled, 'Rose, what's the name of that restaurant we
went to last night?' |
Permalink | Source : Australia, India, Sri Lanka - Australian Joke of the day
Rating: 6.7/10 (7 votes cast) |
My kids love going to the Web, and they keep track of their passwords by writing them on Post-it notes.
I noticed their Disney password was "MickeyMinnieGoofyPluto," and asked why it was so long.
"Because," my son explained, "they say it has to have at least four characters."
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Permalink | Source : Kiwi box - today's pick Joke of the day
Rating: 6.6/10 (5 votes cast) |
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Travel photos
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