Jokes of the day for Tuesday, 13 January 2009

Funny jokes, funny photo and funny video collected from the internet on Tuesday, 13 January 2009
  • Currently 9.53/10

Rating: 9.5/10 (133)

Two guys in a life raft in the...

Two guys in a life raft in the middle of the ocean. One sees an old bottle floating. He picks it up and rubs it,and a genie comes out.

The genie says, "For letting me out, I will grant you one wish." The guy says, (without thinking) "Turn this ocean into beer". And the ocean turns into the best beer anybody has ever tasted.

The second guy says to the first, "You idiot, now we'll have to piss in the boat".
#joke #beer
Joke | Source: Jokes of the day - Used to be Joke rating machine, but this site is dead
  • Currently 4.13/10

Rating: 4.1/10 (8)

Poundstretchers and Marks & Sp...

Poundstretchers and Marks & Spencer are to amalgamate to beat the credit crunch. They will be known as Stretchmarks!
Dode Broadleaf, Drylaw

If you have a joke y to share with us e-mail: letters_en

The full article contains 41 words and appears in Edinburgh Evening News newspaper.
Page 1 of 1

  • #joke
Joke | Source: - Joke of the day
  • Currently 3.00/10

Rating: 3.0/10 (4)

Why did the supermodel stare a...

Why did the supermodel stare at the can of orange juice? Because it said "concentrate."
#joke #short
Joke | Source: Click The City - Philippine's Leading Lifestyle and Entertainment Guide.
  • Currently 4.00/10

Rating: 4.0/10 (2)

You Thought Y2K Would Be Bad...

The businessman dragged himself home and barely made it to

his chair before he dropped exhausted.

His sympathetic wife was right there with a tall cool drink

and a comforting word. "My, you look tired," she said. "You

must have had a hard day today. What happened to make you so


"It was terrible," her husband said. "The computer broke

down and all

of us had to do our own thinking."

Joke | Source: Jokes of the day - Taken from Bartender's guide to Jokes, Drinks, and Poker - once good site, no longer active.
  • Currently 5.00/10

Rating: 5.0/10 (4)

Happy New Year…Is Everybody Happy!!!??? (Author A. Nonymous)

I want you to be the first to send you this Happy New Year g Answering Machine Messages

Hi, this is Stephanie's answering machine.

If you're the phone company asking for money, stop bugging her, she'll send it sooner or later. If you're a TV company advertising TVs, she already has a TV with every channel known to man, and several known to monkeys.

If you called for any other reasons, please hang up the phone, start screaming, and run to the nearest shoe store. When you get there, ask them for a cheeseburger. (This probably won't help you, but we'll always have something to laugh about when we're bored.)

Answering Machine Messages

#joke #newyear
Joke | Source: Joke of the day - Jokes of the day on Wordpress
  • Currently 4.09/10

Rating: 4.1/10 (11)

A student received a software ...

A student received a software package from his friend. But, he didn't have a computer.

The label on the package said that the software required "Windows 3.1 or better."

So, he bought a Macintosh.

#joke #short
Joke | Old joke from joke of the day archives - Check out other old jokes Thursday, 19 June 2008
  • Currently 4.75/10

Rating: 4.8/10 (12)

Calculate the number 1695

NUMBERMANIA: Calculate the number 1695 using numbers [1, 6, 8, 9, 70, 119] and basic arithmetic operations (+, -, *, /). Each of the numbers can be used only once.
Brain Teasers, puzzles, riddles, mathematical problems, mastermind, cinemania...

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