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Short jokes - funny one liners (8001 to 8040)Short funny jokes. These jokes are less 300 chars long, so easy to remember! These are the jokes listed 8001 to 8040. |
Q: What kind of candy do India
Q: What kind of candy do Indians give out on Halloween?A: Dots.
Walking economy
A guy is walking down the street with his friend. He says to his friend, "I'm a walking economy."
His friend replies, "How's that?"
"It's like this -- my hair line is in recession, my stomach is a victim of inflation, and the combination of these factors is putting me into a deep depression."
A skeleton walks ...
A skeleton walks down empty Main Street. Suddenly he sees another skeleton carrying a gravestone. "Hey, what are you doing?” the other skeleton answers "Just strolling", "Why do have the gravestone, buddy?", "Because I always want to have some ID”. Yo mama is so fat on Halloween
Yo mama is so fat on Halloween she threw on a white sheet and went as Antarctica.Light and hard
Q: What's the difference between light and hard?
A: You can sleep with a light on.
Why Didn't Cain Please God?
Q: Why didn't Cain please God?A: Because he just wasn't Able.
Yo Mama Is So Bald
Yo mama so bald even a wig wouldn't help!
Yo mama so bald you can see whats on her mind
Yo mama so bald that she took a shower and got brain-washed.
Where will they ear wr
Where will they ear wrecked the Museum of Loud Music?“The high school musi
“The high school music teacher was quite controversial. He told his students to read band books.”
Placing Your Order
A friend and I were standing in line at a fast-food restaurant, waiting to place our order.
There was a big sign posted. "No bills larger than $20 will be accepted."
The woman in front of us, pointing to the sign, remarked, "Believe me, if I HAD a bill larger than $20, I wouldn't be eating here."
A telephone rang. "Hello! Is y
A telephone rang. "Hello! Is your phone number 444-4444?""Yes, it is," came the reply.
"Thank God! Could you call 911 for me? I super-glued my finger to the phone."
In ancient Egypt, pa...
"In ancient Egypt, papyrus farmers taught people the importance of reeding."Toothbrush
How can we tell that the toothbrush was invented in Arkansas?
Had it been invented elsewhere, it would have been called a "teethbrush.
You should not impersonate Pin...
You should not impersonate Pink Floyd. That shalt not commit a Daltrey.Where Have You Been?
The quarrel continued until Adam fell asleep, only to be awakened by someone poking him in the chest.It was Eve.
"What do you think you're doing?" Adam demanded.
"Counting your ribs," said Eve.
If you are either French or Ja...
If you are either French or Jamaican, then chez mon you.Your Halloween costume came in...
Your Halloween costume came in the mail today. I opened it. It was a rooster mask and a bag of lollipops. Going as a c*ck sucker again!?Bad Haircut
When your friend says he/she got a bad haircut and the phone
rings, tell them it's "Fantastic Sam's . . . they want to
settle out of court."
Bambi, a blonde in her fourth ...
Bambi, a blonde in her fourth year as a UCLA freshman, sat in her US government class. The professor asked Bambi if she knew what Roe vs. Wade was about.Bambi pondered the question then finally said, "That was the decision George Washington had to make before he crossed the Delaware."
“I shouldn't have plu...
“I shouldn't have plugged my iPhone into the PC at the kitchen. It's now in the sync.”
One of the courses I taught wh...
One of the courses I taught when I was a college professor was Freshman English. To my first class of students I described the basic parts of an essay: "Remember, the three parts of an essay are the Introduction, the Body, and the Confusion".Panhandlers make excellent ...
Panhandlers make excellent man a jars.“When the cigarette l...
“When the cigarette lighter salesman tried to win back his old flame he found that he had met his match.”
Moving to Berlin
Michael Jackson says he wants to move to Berlin.
As soon as the Germans heard about it they started to put the wall back up.
